Geez, I found a book I hadn't read before -- The Thief of Always by Clive Barker and remembered that an old friend of Tim's, is a big fan. I googled his page and found that this man is not only wildly successful but also really good looking. Yeah, I knew he was successful, but I wasn't reckoning on the good looking part. Sheesh, some people have all the luck.

A tree was growing on the far side of the fence in the back yard. It was about ten feet tall and was dropping into the lawn. Tim had mentioned last week that 'something needed to be done about it,' and suggested a saw. I grunted in half agreement and turned my attention to something else. Yesterday we were standing outside gauging whether or not the lawn needed to be mowed. "Do we have a saw?" Tim asked. I shook my head and asked why.

"Because that tree," he pointed with a quick gesture "has to go."
"We don't need a saw for that, just go and break it off," I answered.
"You can't just do that, it's too green," he explained patiently.
"No you don't," I said. "Just go and break it. It may require a little twisting, but we don't need a saw." I imagined an hour trip to home depot, wandering through their massive aisles before facing an economic decision of choosing between five hundred models. Of course Tim would want the best because everything we get a Home Depot is an investment. I felt like we had spent enough money this month and cringed at the thought of shelling out big bucks for a stupid saw.

"Geez," I swore and stomped down the steps.
"What are you gonna do?" he asked as I strode across the lawn carefully watching for dog bombs.
"I am going to break it," I stated and met with the tree face to branch. I bent down, grabbed the thickest part of the trunk and cracked it. Not one single twist was required. I brandished my leafy prize over my head to a scowling Tim. "See?" I shouted, "And I did it with my bare hands!"