So the online journals I frequent the past couple of days have been...how shall I say...scanty. Yes, that will do. Then it occurred to me that I have not exactly been holding up my end of the bargain either. Well, I should fix that right here, right now.

I decided to take a break from the same old, and be a bit gloomy about the gloomy weather and watch a movie. The movie was Freaky Friday and I figured it was okay because Tim didn't want to see it anyway. It was okay, I guess. Teenage movie and Ms Curtis being 'wacky' and 'fun.' I remember the first time I saw Freaky Friday was in third grade at Glenwood Elementary. We were all shuffled into the gym where they had a big projector set up over the stage, and we ALL watched a movie. I do think that is a lot more fun than a stupid pep rally, don't you? We also saw Black Hole, later that year. I had that thought that movie was pretty scary and couldn't imagine how the 1st graders could handle it. Brave little soldiers.

Speaking of which, I had a nightmare this morning about Tim and his brother Ben (and every available man for that matter) going off to war. They didn't want to, it wasn't a draft and yet, every available man was going. I told Tim that he couldn't hack it and he shouldn't go, and for god's sake we need to get Pluto out of Milwaukee because -- who was going to take care of him. I was desperate to find someone to take to Milwaukee to get him so that I would have something of Tim when he was gone. I cried and cried and was entirely inconsolable until Ben finally took me and we got him and were on way back home -- where I had to face my toughest farewell -- when thankfully, I woke up.

It has been a long time since an apocalyptic type nightmare has scared me. Usually it's the demons and their evil trickery that get to me, this time...it was the simple thought of losing my darling and not being able to damn thing about it.

+++

Speaking of darling, he isn't the best editor in the world. He has only gone through three pages so far -- he says it feels like work. Not a promising sign, I know. But that isn't what he means. I may have to start looking at it myself if he doesn't do anything this weekend.

My garden has begun to sprout! I saw little shoots coming up but despaired over how they were going to break through the tough top that looked like a cracked desert when my neighbor said to water them. Whoa...what a difference ladies and gentlemen. This "Watering" idea is fantastic! I don't think it is going to rain as much as the weather man promised either, so I may have to go out there with my empty milk gallon jug and water it every day... Yes, I do have a hose, it's just too much hassle to take out unless I am going to keep it out. And what a waste of water...right?

I have no plans this weekend. Absolutely none. Maybe I will go to the library and make amends. I wish it weren't so cold today, I would have gone then.

DONE! My gosh, I am done. With the first draft at least. It is now printed out and sitting on my editor's desk along with one red gel pen, a ballpoint red pen, and a red pencil for good measure. Total word count: 18,865. However I know right now I need to write four more scenes, but those are more artisitic pieces that will add to the story, but not take away. If that makes any sense. I am going to work on those while he plods his way through my coming of age, deciet filled, slightly paranormal story. I can't believe it...but you know, it don't feel as good as I expected I would. Maybe because I know it is going to take some serious work to whup it into shape. Depending on how long it takes for the proofread copy to be updated, I expect my volunteers to be getting a copy very soon. That is if you haven't chickened out. Of course if you have you just have to let me know and I won't bother you with it. :)

Okay, and now on to TKD.

See this and more in the Week in Pictures.

Over all though, it was a busy and alternating ... blah week. Too many gray days in a row tend to get me down. Yesterday I was very low energy, but I would expect to feel that way after a bachelorette party. :)

Last night we watched The Returner which was pretty good, and then went to bed early. Woo! Exciting.

I got one of them fancy new google mail thingers and passed it onto Tim since he has a lousy hotmail account. So you should email him to say hi or something at cimicis at gmail dot com

Tonight we are going to Richard's MFA getting art show. Did I mention that I saw his wife and the kids (as well as him) a couple weeks ago at the MATC powwow? Of course I mentioned that. What I might NOT have mentioned that half way through getting Cassidy ready I noticed that Carla seemed...bigger. Her tummy was totally sticking out, but yet she had tons of energy and was moving about very robustly. She didn't even sit down once, despite repeated pats of the bleacher. So, I asked Tim if she didn't maybe look like she was pregnant. He said he didn't know. (Men, they are so freaking helpful). Yet, I kept thinking "Well, she has three kids already...this is going to be four and I swear they were gonna stop at three." Oh, I wanted to ask her...I SO wanted to ask her. But the fear of being wrong overcame that desire.

Turns out, she IS pregnant and not only that, but DUE next week. Geez! I could kick Richard's ass for not telling me. Now, I have decided that I won't do what I always said I would, of not telling anyone that we were expecting. Lesson learned.

Oh, and in other news:

hadjare: I am so evil.
hadjare: I have just committed massive snailcide.
Bugboy: cool
hadjare: Cool? That I should be convicted of war crimes
Bugboy: they're just snails
Bugboy: You've even eaten snails
hadjare: I knew you would put that against me. Not only do treat them like invertebrates but I have also eaten their flesh. Thanks alot. That is going to get me far in the trial of snails.
Bugboy: Snails don't have trials. They don't understand justice. It's all about revenge with them.
hadjare: Oh great.

Did you know that ifyou wrap celery in aluminum foil and it put it in the fridge it will last for weeks?

My big white molly died and those snails...those evils snails who 15-20 of them were having a group orgy...ate her corpus before I could give her a three flush salute. The snails are getting big...huge and hungry. It is time to commit snailcide. All I need is a cucumber and they will DIE. Although I do feel like finding the fish basket so that I could scoop up all the sinning snails and flush them out of existence. I wonder if I could take a picture of them.... I will try that for week in pictures.

There...I took some pictures...also of Gypsy (racing name Dixie). I don't think she is a Dixie... I think her new name is better. She's a cutie though and starting to perk up after the operation. She ran into a cat she didn't like this morning. Arkham swapped her and now she unfortunately growls whenever Innsmouth or Arkham come near the crate or stare at her. Sigh. Gotta fix that.

Okay, I am going to write today like I have never written before.

It doesn't feel like anything is going according to plan. The only successful things I did today was make coffee and clean the bedroom to make room for Dixie. The greyhound we are going to foster for "no more than two weeks." She just had her operation and needs recuping. Sigh. After chop saki we are going to go over and get a crate lent to us for this purpose. This whole thing is so half assed.

Plus, I have a bridal shower to host this weekend, and two dogs + rain = muddy house. I can't win. I woke up with a headache this morning, and my right arm is tingly. I bet I have ms or something. Oh and when I took Pluto out a 1/2 hour ago he did nothing but play a little. He doesn't go potty well in the rain. He hates it. I am just going to make Tim walk him and have to deal with the bag of crap.

Oh and I was going to go to the grocery store to pick up some breakfast/lunch items but it just started to rain. Blast if I am going to ride my bike in this crap and get all wet. I hate getting wet except when I am really really hot. Heh, which is ironic because whenever we camp it rains.

I need to write this blasted story, but all I suceeded in doing was writing three letters. Yes it is writing, but it doesn't count. I should just go and put some music on, pour myself some more acid, and clean the house with some incense burning. Then maybe my arm won't feel so numb and I can type out the rest of my story (but it so long!), or ... hey, I could orate it and tape it. Then I could transcribe what I wrote down....it's an idea. But I don't think I could stand to listen to my own voice for that long. Just like I can't stand to look in a mirror at myself. I just kind of avoid it.

I think I would rather just have a good friend over, or even a sibling to just play video games.

Alright, I have a new feature for you! The Week in Pictures! Heck yeah. Now you can see some of the crap I am talking about, OR you can just see pictures. I figured I should make some use of my digital camera. Instead of putting it on this page and making it all complicated I am going to just put it on the photos page, which you can check out by clicking on the handy link to your left.

This weekend we rode bike 23 miles, grilled out, took Pluto to the dog park. I personally, dug a garden and did other garden work, went out Saturday night to the Inferno and drinker's remorse the following day (why can't I keep my mouth shut???), learned more Ho Chunk and thought of the week in pictures idea. Yeah, it was a busy weekend...okay maybe not Sunday. For the first time in along time I watched TV all freaking day. I saw: Jessica Simpson driven (the last part of it), Karate Kid, Beautiful Girl, Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion and Babylon Five 3:3. If you guessed that I didn't even change the channel (except twice) then you were right!

Gotta make dinner. Dirty mac tonight, man I am hungry!

Oh and remember WEEK IN PICTURES! !!!

I did work on my story today. I also worked out, took pluto for a walk, went to the zoo with Hilary, Mina and Leta and even have some pictures, although I kind of want to ask first before I post something like that. I filled out our applications for BBBS, made a lunch date with an old friend, and now going to bed.

It's only 9:15 and I am whupped. Today I: wrote, TKD, dug a garden, transplanted sod to part of Pluto's track, cleaned the living room, returned overdue books, studied Ho Chunk and made dinner.

Tomorrow? Writing. Plant lavendar and catnip. Work out. Write some more. Ho Chunk. I think I need to focus on writing...must finish story.

But for now? Man, I am so tired. I should just go to bed.

I am gardener, hear me roar!

I worked the soil underneath the lilac tree today because I wanted to plant the lilly of the valley that Jen had given me. I go through all the work of tilling it up with a hoe, working in peat moss and manure only to find out that there was one little dried up root thing. That's it? One little root thing? Did Jen already plant other ones and just leave one? Or is one all I need? Man. So I planted it and felt disappointed that there was all that other readied soil going to waste. Then I remembered she has some hosana? Or something like that. So I went and planted six of them on the other side. I figure that I can control it's growth along side the fence in the opposite direction. Hopefully the lily will grow, if not then I am going to buy some. I must have lily of the valley under a lilac tree. My Mom had planted a lillac tree and lily of the valley underneath it at my Dad's, decades ago when she was first married to him. It is still there and I have admired it so.

Speaking of Mom, she called to ask me if my house blew up. I said no, and that no houses around me blew up either. I later saw that a house over on Atwood did blow up at 4:00 AM this morning with no real rhyme or reason. Although a body was discovered in the basement. I suspect suicide. I assured my Mom that Tim is the safest, law abiding citizen that I know and we are very cautious about the house. She said that her dad was like that.

Oh man, I can't wait for the end of the week and all the wonderful warmth to come to us. I am excited to start the lavendar, cat nip and work the ground to for a little mini garden behind the garage. We have such limited space for sunlight in the yard....I am going to be creative. The hippy neighbors have been out all week getting their garden ready. They are super excited about this upcoming season... hey at least we have something in common now (aside from dogs). I wish there was a place around here that I could get stone so I could make some borders and do a little landscaping. Growing up, we would just walk into the woods and pick up some...in town that is a little harder to do.

I finished and sent the taxes out today. Thank god that is done. Next year is going to be a lot easier with just one state to deal with.

I also wrote today, and got a good chunk done. After chop saki tonight and making dinner I WILL go back and plow through it some more.

Oh, and I request an application for Big Brother/Sisters today for Tim and I to join and be a Big couple, I suppose. :) I woke up this morning with a feeling that I should do it. So I did it.

Uh. What should I say? Hm. I saw Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere last Thursday. It was pretty good for BBC. I also watched Hellboy on Friday (courtesy of a half day for Tim). I liked it, there was an apocalyptic scene in there, why *wouldn't* I like it? And how can you beat "My kittens! Save my kittens!" Up next is the Philadelphia experiment -- a 1984 science fiction movie. One great thing about Netflix is my scifi viewing has increased dramatically. [post note: it sucked. I watched half of it and sent it back.]

Writing. Haven't done any today but fully intend to start any minute now. I must finish it this week. I gots to. Gotta gotta do it. I know, novels aren't written in a month or even three, take George RR Martin for example, Feast for Crows is FINALLY slated for an August 3rd release date after...how many years? I do want to at least get through the first draft and finish it...so that I can move onto other stories and start the polishing stage.

______ he shed gee, ja goey sha na?

How do you say _______.

OH and we are gonna go to Skinny Puppy show! Awesome. It has been a long time since I have wanted to see a show. At least I think so, this Wednesday thing is a bit of a bugger. If Tim can't go then I will shoulder on without him.

I watched Star Trek Nemesis last night, and the only good thing about it was Lil' Jean Luc. He was kind of cute.

Woo Hooo! Twenty five buckeroos has been made and will be slotted for the vacation fund. I was looking at ticket prices last night and got totally bummed because they are so expensive! The cheapest is 273!! Tim then reminded me that we have lots of airline miles....42K to be exact. It costs 25K for US Canada Trip to anywhere (and only 50 outside of the US???). Not quite enough for two tickets, but plenty enough for one. Tim started to get all fighty and not want to do it...saying he wants to use his miles for a real expensive plane ticket somewhere. At which piont, I say "Where the hell would we go?" To which he responsed... "I don't know, Seattle? British Columbia?"

Hm. I would like to visit BC, but I can wait on that. I would rather get to know the pen pals I have in that area better, and have Ben and Jen settled in before we crash the place. But we can do that NEXT year. This year, I vowed we are taking a vacation and what good are those miles if you don't use em? You can't hoard miles. They aren't REAL money. Geez. Although we are considering driving...though not our own car. "Miles on the car...." You see, Tim is obessed with miles.

So, now the trip seems so much more manageable again. :D

This past weekend was a busy one. On Friday we went over to visit Hilary, her new baby the cranky Mina and meet the Husband. I thought we were just going to drop off some things and then leave, but we actually ended up staying and visiting! Woo. When we did leave, I stayed up late making moccasins for my friends daughter, and a beaded barrette. Man, five year olds have BIG ski's. Seriously. Kids feet are HUGE!

Saturday we slept in, and that night went to the MATC powwow. It was fun, although disappointing that my friends daughter got a big case of the 'shy' and only went out once -- even though she had apparently been exicited the whole day. Now I remember why I thought my grandmother was gruff at times...I bet I tried to pull the same thing except she wouldn't hear any of it and I was out there. Glad though...because I wanted nothing more than to dance. They had to leave early though because one of the boys was goofing around and split his lip. It wouldn't stop bleeding and while the kid was okay holding his blood rag to his face, everyone else had to hover. :D He he. I can go into more detail about the powwow but I honestly don't think your interested.

Sunday I went off to Sigrid's family bridal shower with Sarah. It was a pleasant time and nice to see Lowen again and hang out with Sarah. But LOOOOooooooonnnnnngggggg. The best part was the lemon bars and the violet party favor plant which I sent off to Epic with Tim to adorn his window and sit next to Millie (the english ivy).

Yesterday I rode bike to TKD for the noon class and almost died on one of the hills right before the place and had to get off my bike and do the walk of shame. :( I hope by the end of the summer I will be able to ride the whole way, no matter how slowly. TKD was hard! Lots of new moves and I had to be instructed aside, at the end, what the difference between a side kick and a roundhouse kick were. They look so alike! Then I came home and mopped the kitchen, only to see it go to hell today because it rained last night. It is SO nice out right now...the budding plants sucked that moisture right up and made it green. Very refreshing outside and warm. Maybe I will go and get some ground ready to plant my Lily of the Valley.

But first, I must clean the living room, and then write. But for now, I think my coffee is done.

When terrible or tough times befall us, I try not to focus on it. I try to just keep going ahead and trust that something will happen. Tim on the other hand will fall into a deep pit of misery and threaten to take me with him. There have been times when I am tempted to sever that lifeline and just let him swim in his pity pool. I don't want to drown. BUT I don't. I hang around on the side of the pool with one of those emergency tubes ready to throw at him when I can. But I still hope something will turn up. It always does.

Tim got a raise! How awesome is that? That is just what we needed.

Janice came by the other day and dropped off four books. I am to read and review these books as they are candidates for the Wisconsin historical something or other award AND I get a small consultation fee! Neat. Right now I am reading about hobo's in the midwest, and last night dreamed I jumped a train.

TKD is awesome! On Wednesday they had a sparring class meant for the upper belts, but since there was two newbies there (me and this other dude), we got to spar...except slowly. It was fun and totally reminded me of my ninja days with my brother out in the front yard by the light of the moon... However I don't think I will go back until I learn more moves and am more confident in blocking etc. But YAH! It's fun.

Wednesday night Tim Djayed at the Inferno. It was. ... okay. I had a good time with Tim' sets and danced more than I have in a long time. But I was disappointed at the crowd. I remember the first April fool's masquerade they had and the place was packed....now? Not so much. Madison's alternative dark crowd disappoints me. There still has to be the same amount of misunderstood college kids and such...where do they go now? What is their subculture?

Yesterday Tim took the day off to recuperate. It was a glorious vacation day where I too, did nothing but watched TV and cut out squares for my first quilt. We watched Treasure Planet last night and ate fresh from the oven brownies with vanilla ice cream. OH was that good. I begin to tell you how heavenly it tasted.

Today, I am going to make some casseroles, ride my bike, take a shower and write write write...oh and do the dishes...(I wish someone else would do them....at least once), laundry, clean kat boxes, and take Pluto out for a walken's.

OH and I almost forgot! I got Tim yesterday in an April Fool's! I didn't want to do anything mean like say the animals were bleeding or hurt, etc. So I thought of a simple one. He was playing his game with his headphones on and I said "Tim...go answer that." He says what? I say "I thought I heard someone at the door." He gets up and walks to the front door. Is there anyone there, I ask. He says "No, no one here." At which point Pluto comes to see what Tim is doing. Then I shouted "April Fool's!" And he got all embarassed.

You see, if he had been aware he would have noticed that Pluto didn't move an inch from his crate until Tim was at the front door. If someone had knocked, or merely brushed the door with their fingernails, Pluto would have been there in an instant. He he. I got him.