Huh. My little brother got a webcam. It was weird to see him, and then later my Mom on it. Technology is so neat sometimes...but still not neat enough to convince me that I need one. Finished two major projects this week. I am taking pictures so you can see later.

I had one of the best oatmeal cookies of my life this morning. It was a small cookie and I wish there were more, but if there were then I would probably end up eating them. Yesterday I had my tooth fixed and went home, made a mocha, cleaned, made dinner, watched Joe Millionaire .... er...is this show getting more ridiculous by the second? Ridiculous as in funny, of course...because the whole disney animal montage was great...and the butler! Holy shit. He took the "I choose you" puzzle! And the fake sadness the smokers had for Mojo when she didn't get the necklace. Huh. I was SURE Zora was going to get booted.

Then I spent the rest of the night writing. I wrote my Mom and Sigrid a letter. Made Tim vacuum the living room. Got an email from Mari, who said "Superb" in reaction to my news of visiting her next month and suggested places to eat on Friday, February 28th. I got an letter from one the Hollywood penpal who had first described herself as a "goth chick". Admittedly, I took the bait...so far she doesn't seem to bad. I commented to Tim on counting her total goth points in the course of the letter. Pure goth points (one point awarded for each thing goth):

1. Decorated envelope with hand drawings of characters from JTHM
2. Use of the word "spooky" to describe one of them
3. Use of the word "goth" TWICE on the outside envelope alone
4. Use of phrase "woe is me" (but in different context than this)
5. Belle and Sebastian are the names of her cats
6. Donnie Darko mention in favorite movie list
7. Depressed Mode (aka depeche mode)
Total = 7 points.

=^-^=

But aside from that...she seems cool. Really lively, and descriptive, I think it will be a great penpal. I am excited. I also got a birthday card from Kersten. It was JUST a card....with her name signed on it. That was a first. Even the Ho-Chunk Nation said "Laura...blah blah birthday filler....HoChunk Nation" But it was a nice thought. I am kind of sad that Phillip Morris forgot it was my birthday this year. He must have known I was going to quit and therefore sending me loot was no good.

I changed Excerpts, and encourage anyone who wants to participate with me to do so. As of today, I have not even started on my own topic so there isn't an unfair advantage.

So far no smoking this weekend, it will be easier when work starts I hope...other things to distract ourselves with? Plus Tim promised to come tomorrow and write words to accompany the House on the Rock photos. And I also finished the Tea Cozy! It's cute as a dicken's.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Last night Eric and Kate took Tim and I out to Merle's for a nice birthday dinner. I had steak. It was GOOD. Then we went home and I watched the Surreal life (and man is that some surreal stuff). Other than the dinner it was pretty uneventful. 8)

Today I bought donuts, bagels and muffins into work because not only is it my birthday, but it is Cathy's as well (a coworker of mine). Of course everyone forgot, and the Andrew the Temp who gives me an Tim rides in the morning, wanted to pay for it or to call Katie and see if she planned anything...but I told him no. Don't do that. That will make them feel bad. Besides, I wanted a donut. For thirteen bucks I got Coffee and lots of food, for a nice little spread.

It's really quiet to day. Katie is gone to visit her sick grandmother. Andrew is rewriting this play to make into his opera. Jessica is doing hell knows what. Rita is making schedules and chatting in greek, and I have just finished reading all of my morning journals and am now making my own entry. Rather unproductive morning, but also nice and quiet.

Last night I got a ride home with Andrew and was in the door by 5.30. It was nice. I wasn't feeling well, so I smoked a smoke (only two more days left) and went to lay down. Rest would not come to me because Migo wandered around the apartment yowling. Tim yelled at her once to be quiet, which she was for a mere two minutes and then continued her lonely wail. Finally I got up and took her to the potty. She went and I went back to bed only to be harassed by more howling. Tim of course, is oblivious to all of this as his headphones only allow the sound of little digital robots blowing up other digital robots with the occasional techno..okay I can't even tell you what kind of noise it is making because I haven't heard it it in so long. But I ASSUME it is making footsteps and gun noises and blowing up stuff noise). I catch Migo and put a neck gaiter around her. I figure it is soft and won't hurt her, but would keep her occupied. She squirts out of it moments later. Then I put a red ribbon around her, with some fake hair remnants tied pinned to the ribbon. That kept her busy for a few minutes and looked even more promising when Arkharm started to follow her around and pounce. Finally, someone would play with her. I went back to bed, but sleep would not come. I was afraid I would be too tired to watch Buffy, which I missed last week because I was watching a movie...the Wonder Boys. (Very inspirational movie). The Migo plan only lasted like 10 minutes because she started up again and Tim took off the ribbon (it would have worked it's way free eventually). Anybody want a cat that want's to be actively played with every waking moment of the day?


At the end of Buffy Tim surprised me with a delicious dinner of pork chops, couscous and mixed vegetables. I got up and joined him at the table with a glass of wine. It was nice. Afterward I was still pretty tired and unmotivated and retired to bed to read more Crytonomicon. I just feel like I haven't had much time for reading lately with all my other projects. I also got a letter from Virginia in Texas. She's 33, into information and library science originally from New York for her entire life except the last seven months and hates it there, I have quite an interesting perspective on Texas now. ...

Last night I went to a suprise birthday party for Mischa [note to self, need a solo picture of Mischa]. He was suprised. I had a headache before we left and on the train I got motion sick. I figured I hadn't eated and that was why I felt crappy. Then half way through the party I just didn't feel good any more and so I wanted to go home. Home we went and to sleep I slept. Tim said I was getting sick. I said that was impossible because on Saturday it will be three years since I have last been sick with a virus or bacteria. Today.... I feel fine. It was probably just the heat and motion sick that made me feel crappy. YaH!

However, I think I *am* going to be sick on Friday. 8^\

Tired.
Did I mention I got a letter from one of the 'new!' pen pals? Yes, indeed. Her name is Kim and she is from Washington. She writes "Let's see: TV. We watch: Stargate SG1, Farscape, Buffy, Angel, Trading Spaces, Changing Rooms and Junkyward Wars." Um. Has anyone noticed the key word here? She said Farscape. I can't believe. Of course as many of you know, I was obsessed with Farscape to the point of really wanting to go to a convention. But I have quit putting it in introductory letters and descriptions about myself because no one knows what the hell I am talking about. This is SO cool. I brought the letter to reply to this week. I also have to write Gale, Sigrid, Laura and Erin. Maybe I will just send the latter two cards with short letters, to get the ball rolling again. [Note to self: Get solo pic of Sigrid, scan Gale and upload]

This weekend we had a marathon watching Babylon Five. Mike and Rachel , and her strange cousin Julian, called on Saturday night to do something. Since were obviously doing nothing we went, especially since they were kind enough to give us a ride. We went to this bowling place but upon walking it I was thrown back to high school. Worse yet, I was flashed back into one of those lame roller rink turned teen dance club places in northern Wisconsin (ie, river falls, rice lake, etc). The music was even the same. I was pretty much enthralled and was nudged by Tim to leave. The waiting list was something like two hours. What do you do when you are rejected from bowling? Friends, the answer is simple. You visit a bar.

Hidee hiddee hiddee ho. Off to a Irish pub we go. We ended up staying there the whole night drinking and eventually playing darts where yours truly, kicked ass. After we were almost booted out we went to Clarks and ate some food. Tim was falling asleep and getting bitchy so it was a good thing we got home at the awfully late hour of 2:00 and went to sleep. Tim is such a peanut.

Sunday, seriously...I knitted and watched Babylon Five. Then I encouraged Tim to set up a table so he could paint miniatures while watching B5 with me. Once we did that, we were pretty much set for the rest of the day, with a brief break to make pretzels. Went to bed at 10:00....so that doesn't explain why I was so tired this morning. I honestly felt dizzy and fall over tired. Duty calls though. No, not any kind of cool duty like being a commander of ...oh say....Babylon Five, or even being second in command, or even head of security. No, I must be program coordinator for a bunch of whiny professors and their spoiled students, post docs, work shitties and lab techs. Although I generally sympathize with the lab techs. They are working joes like you and I.

I get to go to LONDON!!! And Scotland. Rock on.

Love, is a burning thing

Tim came home last night. I was happy to see him. He's so cute. =^-^=
Knitted more last night. Got a letter from Sigrid! Work is tons better. I have the little moccasin souvenirs that Tim brought back from the Indian Art Museum in Canada on my desk. They are awfully cute. 8)

Yesterday was anxious. There is this stupid situation going on in one of the building...no both of the buildings..but, it is causing me undo concern. What happened in there are like 150 people working on two floors in various labs. You cannot eat in the lab, and there isn't enough common space for the folks to go too. So what has happened over the past years is people started constructing little "coffee bars" outside in the hallway. Complete with tables, chairs, benches, coffee makers, espresso machines, fish tanks, refrigerators, microwaves, etc. Most of the appliance are plugged into an extension cord and run UNDER the door into a lab. Does anyone want to tell me why the fire marshal thinks this is a problem? So, the fire marshal has asked them before to please clean up their space, and not be so over the frigging top. They ignored it...three times, until the fire chief says "Fuck it, clear it all!" (Expletive may or may not have been used).

Now is my problem to get those hallways clear in the face absolute opposition from everyone there. In other words...they do not find this "suggestion" agreeable. Um...is not your choice to find it agreeable or not folks. If there is a fire, then you are all going to burn.

But, that isn't how it works. So today, I wrote a list of recommendations for a 'good faith' effort....and made sure to not that I do not guarantee anything...aka it is not my fault if you don't clear the hallways and are fined. It is a terrible compromise for me...but maybe it will clean it up and look more presentable and discreet until the new building opens up to offer some relief. This is why I am getting that whole extra dollar an hour while my supervisor is on maternity leave. This is the "great responsibility." Uff. I take responsibility for everyone else in this office and answering questions, but I hate politics. Hate it.

Tim comes back today! Yah!!! Last night he told me that he was now having a good trip because the people at the Ottawa Indian Museum were so nice. They gave him neat hand crafted souvenirs for his company, and a beaded pouch type thing that hold the umbilical cord. (No, a U cord does not come with it, thankfully). I am excited to see that, and more importantly excited to see my darling.

Last night I started on the tea cozy I am knitting Eric and Kate (because I was re taught how to cast off yesterday) while watching Beyond Belief and Angel. The zombies were cool, although I am little sorry that Galen died. 8( Then I moved on to work on beadwork for the moccasin's I am making for the Geisler's son. Then I finished a letter, wrote an email to my dad, listened to some Ho-Chunk, read a great email from Melissa, and packed it up and went to bed by 11.00. Good for me.

Got a call from the Chemistry department about a job for Greg. It took me 1.5 hours to screw up the courage to go back out into in the cold and wait outside their building for someone to let me in (they have no phone, and no working buzzer). I waited for five minutes in the cold before deciding to light up a smoke when someone came in at that instant. I tried to put my smoke out, but it was unsuccessful, and went in. Walked up one floor to their apartment, puffed and the smoke started right away. I gave him the job thing and they told me he got a temp job starting tomorrow. How fortunate! We talked a bit and then I came back to call Tim. I did not realize in Ottawa they all speak french. Suck.

So, two or three tries later I finally realize that unending silence after the french babble, is supposed to be an answering machine. I leave a message...and then call back at after 10. Poor Tim had a terrible trip going through O'hare, and finally customs in Canada. They drill you harder than anyone imaginable...and to top off the misery he finds that he forgot his dress pants!!! I tried to calm him and said that it wouldn't be that bad. That he would just wear the nice green pants and a sweater and ask the kind ladies at the indian musuem where he could purchase pants because they were inadvertantly left behind. They would be happy to help him. People usually are happy to help nice people who ask for help, right? Especially when they travel a long way to train you on something.

Uff. I am a wino tonight. We decided this last weekend to start buying the big glass jugs of wine because it is 1. Cheaper, 2. Better for you, 3. Takes up less space than beer. I had one glass when I came home, made dinner then went over to Bekah's house and they made me have some (I had a small glass) then back here where I drank one while listening to Tim's woe's and now one more because I am tipsy and my good sense of judgement has gone out the window. Bekah offered for me to go over for dinner tommorrow. I don't know, maybe I will, maybe I won't. I wanted to do some things for myself. Namely, the healing thing (that makes me think of my little old friend Myrna) that would help me get over a problem. That healing thing would be writing a letter saying all of my thoughts...etc and then putting it away afterward. I am hoping by doing this I will reach some kind of resolution of 'ending' for myself, so that I can move on. I have high hopes for this year and I do not want to be bogged down by things from this last year. However in the past two days I got a package in the mail that was regifting something, and an email. I put the email away and found someone else to take the planner (as it was) because my Dad had already given it to me. It makes me think it might be in good effort..but then again, I don't know. I was SO hurt after hearing the news I did this past weekend. I don't think I can let myself do this anymore.

I would just much rather talk to her about it...at least one last time if that is what it is meant to be.

Last night I cleaned the kitchen, made softshell tacos for dinner, Tim did laundry, beaded and watched Joe Millionaire. I love how they translated her bad french at the end, funny funny stuff. She must feel like such a dumbass. At least she has her boyfriend to go back too, right? I also really really like the butler.

We were a little late rushing out this morning because Tim has a trip to Ottawa today. I told him not to talk to any pretty Inuit Canooks and to not bring them home or replace me. Although he said he would get me something from the gift shop at the museum (inuit indian museum or something). I don't have anything Inuit. Every I do have is all woodland or plains indian orientated. Hmm I might have something more to say a little later. I get a little lonely at night when Tim is gone on trips so I might come back later. I hope I get a letter in the mail today.

Weird! The coincidence is unnerving.

Wahoo. I found another penpal...well...rather she found me. She is from Vienna and seems SUPER interesting. I do not know anything else about her. I can't wait for that first letter. Wow, I am really excited. I wonder how old she is, what she does (I think she is out of school based on one line....kind of nice. I find that I really don't care to hear how people have to take test's, do a paper, read a lot..etc. That stuff is only interesting to OTHER students who only want to hear it so that they can bellyache back about how much stuff THEY have to do). Hmm. I have also never had a penpal from Vienna. EeK Excited!

Friday night I didn't hang out with Callie...we made plans and everything but I was really tired. I called her at 6.00 and we made plans to hang out on Saturday during the day instead. I mean, I had nothing to do then, and I rather liked the idea of actual hanging out...vs doing something canned like dinner, movies, or bar. On Saturday morning, I got up, ate breakfast and then Tim went to his Mech Tournament (where he was creamed yet again) and I went to Callie's. We (including Krisiti--cos it was her idea) went to the Mall and we got stuff. Kristi got clothes and shoes, and a candle, Callie got pants and two candle's, and I got some perfume I have been wanting since 1998 --Jessica McClintock the original is a perfume that somehow perfectly captures the essense of Lily of the Valley I almost bought it from a department store..but Kristi had the idea that it would be cheaper at the Parfumania...so she and Callie went to do some recon. Sure enough..cheaper by like 20 bucks! Rock on. I bought the big bottle then. I also got some Clinique soap (I really like Clinique), a candle, hair sticks (three pairs! they are soo pretty), a wafflely like sweater, stickers, note pad and another one of those really good Aunt Annies pretzels. Damn are those good. Then we went back to Callie's had some Chili, made some cookies and decorated them and then I head home. Got home, read, and went to bed.

Sunday Tim bought a Gameboy Advance, we had meal of the day at Noodles and Company and then went grocery shopping. Came home, played respective video games, then I watched Discovery for a while and read. It was a nice day. 8) OH, and I got a letter from Sarah this weekend! It is really one of her best yet. I am excited to write back--I even brought it to work with me to start.

Tired. zzzzzzzz sleepy.
Watched THREE episodes of Babylon Five last night. It is getting a lot better.
Wrote/put together five letters.
GOT a card from Sigrid and a letter from Melissa (who played the part of my maid of honor) written on a cut up menu. 8)
Forgot my keys at home yesterday so I went to the lighthouse for an after work drink.
I'm supposed to do something with Callie tonight but right now I can't think of doing anything because I am so sleepy.

The drawback to pen pal ad's is that inevitably someone from Turkey, Africa, or Egypt sends me a variation of the following:

Hello,
I am young GHANAIAN boy of 25yrs,single and a moslem.I am 6feet-2inches
tall,fair in complexion and a BUILDING/CARPENTRY CONSTRUCTION TECHNICIAN
(student).
I have completed my higher level education and shall apply to the
university to further in ARCHITECTURE or BUILDING CONSTRUCTION TECHNOLOGY.
I live with my both parents but they are very old now,I love parents ,and
you?also I like travelling,music of any kind,exchange of gifts and sharing
ideas with friends including you okey?
I dont have full access to the inetrnet,so if you CARE to reply me and
adding your postal address then,you feel and enjoy the friendship,you will
never regret it.
takecare and feel free to replyme okey?
Your friend in advance .

NOTE----how kind are you to give me the following information once again
1.full name.
2.nationality.
3.sex.
4.marrital status.
5.current activities in life.
ALL THE BEST,CHEER AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR.
JUST DROP ME A PIC.

I need more online journals to read. I have only like.. four that I check on daily. That was always fine before when I had a lot of work todo...but then again it is mure fun when they are stretched out over all day...with a few more to do it. I prefer to read those that I know though...or knew. Like finding old highschool friends journals would be awesome, expect Blog doesn't have a search function, and I didn't exactly pay for my livejournal account (so those options are refused to me). 8( Pooter.

Last night I caught Buffy. What the fuck?! I miss it for a couple weeks and off a sudden I tune in to find that they took me up on my idea of creating an army?! Damn it all. At least it is cool to see that army though. 8) And it still sucks that Angel is moving to a Wednesday time slot....just when it was getting good. Tim and I would watch it on Sunday's (which we have since replaced with Babylon 5 during rerun season). Now I am going to have to tape it on my crappy vcr. I need a new one. It would be cool if they had a dvd player that recorded (other than TIVO). Then I read, and then wrote a letter and finally went to bed. Super tired this morning. I had convinced myself that my alarm clock had a 15 minute snooze this morning. I weighed the pros and cons of getting ready in 15 min...and decided to go for it. A short nap after waking up wouldn't hurt anyone. So I hit the snooze..and it went of 5 minutes later. I looked at my watch in suprise...and then remembered. Yeah. I have a five minute snooze.

Andrew, my ride to work, told me that he has a eight minute snooze. Wow! And that there is such a thing as clocks where you can SET your snooze time? Sign me up! I want one of those clocks. I still have the crappy little alarm clock I bought from Walgreens on State Street when I was in college.

FIVE, 5, read it ... five penpals I made today. Neat. I wrote one of them tonight a short three pager, finished a short three pager for Sarah, and tomorrow they get sent off to their recipients. 8) You know, the only problem with letters...is the liquid ...ness...of them. Meaning, since they are mostly handwritten the stories I end up writing in them only go to one person. And the idea of writing the same story over for another person seems endless. Like I would need some time to distance myself from the story. Then there is the option of printing them out...which I could very well do and therefore the stories could be cut and pasted...JUST the stories mind you. Not the rest of it. And that is problem. A type written letter is generally more informative and stable. A hand written letter may take several hours, days and interupptions to write and therefore takes on a different life of it's own. It has more of a soul then a typed one. A factor in this could be that a letter typed is usually written from work--away from fancy paper, stamps and the like, and the printer is in the dining room next to Tim. Who is ALWAYS on the computer "in the middle of something". So..what to do. A combination of both would be best....or just kick him out and print it and then doctor the paper...and stuff.

Okay. So work is less that busy today. Again. It a new year, and in the new year I always make an effort to meet new people and find more penpals (it helps with the whole writing...to constantly be writing be it fiction, email, letters, etc.). Check out my ad, lets take bets on if anyone answers, shall we?
____________

...but it could not be undone
Posted by: hadjare on Jan. 7 2003, 12:07 pm
Location: North America - United States

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Age : 27
Gender : Female
Text : I am and/like: eccentric, stories, scifi/fanatasy literature, movies, television, costumes. Music ebm/industrial/synth/goth, new age/instrumental/classical, techno/triphop. Meeting new people, ideas, perspectives, ways of living, animals, computers, video games (console more than pc), crafts (ohh do I love crafts: beading, leatherwork, stamping, and various other odd projects), dancing, laughing, I am 1/2 native american, married, no kids and currently living in Chicago.

I prefer postal mail (I hate the word snail), but will do electronic or a combination of both. Interested?

Three years ago, on this day... I broke my back. Callie, Kersten, Luke and Kristi were all there to help me to the car and drive my lame ass to the hospital. Although, we really probably should have taken an ambulance. But then there wouldn't be a story, would there?

Anyway. I just want to express my thanks to everyone that helped us out during that and a special big thanks to Kersten.

++++

This weekend was pretty good. I had escargot last night. It was salty.
I had the worst Jewel Osco experience where I almost started directing carts and yelling at people to be aware of their surroundings after getting stuck in the cereal aisle for 5 minutes. I watched more Babylon 5. Ordered deep dish pizza. Went shopping and got some great stationary deals and crafty stuff. Made two pairs of moccasins and watched a lot of bad movies while I crafted.

You know folks, I really wasn't kidding when I said I had a much longer version available (it is kind of interesting to read...I think.). Oh well. I just haven't had many emails lately, and I am feeling very worthless at work. Did I mention that I did not get that promotion? I just got a new title. Program Coordinator.

Fuckinga. Woo. Plus an extra dollar and hour while my supervisor is on maternity leave for "added responsibilities" which I honestly can't tell you what they are right now because I feel like I have done jack shit. I guess I get the role of being responsible for everything, and for that ....responsiblity I am being compensated. Seems stupid to me. Seems like I should do more than just be responsible for anything that goes wrong. Or maybe I feel that way because (knock on wood) nothing serious has happened. The *only* thing I have to do today is order some furniture for the a conference room renovation that took over two months to hammer out. That is it.

I made two phone calls today too. Does that count for anything? I think I even answered four questions, and replied to two emails, and helped one person with keys.

PLEASE if anyone is in the Milwaukee Area or even Madison has a job lead for Tim or I please, please let me know about it. Keep an eye out? Will ya? (and we might even be convinced about MN --although that would take some convincing). And for the love of God EMAIL me! I am desperate for something to do.

Happy New Year!

New Years' was great. We spent it in Madison....a brief recap. If you would like a more detailed version...which I have...trust me..I had to take it off, it seemed so big. I can send it to you if you like though. Email me.

Christmas holiday: visited dad, visited andrew's brothers, ran a small drug cartel, utilized the services of a tow truck when all the lug nuts sheared off the car, visited old friends and played with small children, saw my 10th grade year book, drove to MN, went to Ground Zero and got in free again thanks to Christain and his connections, went to the Mall of America (Tim first time, it was a weekend of first...including a first time in the back seat of a cop car), and saw Lord of the Ring's again, went to a party that had real irish music, drove back to my Dad's, spent the night, was harrassed by a drunk teen ager, got up the next day, drove home, picked up migo and was happy to be home.

Tim went to work the next day, and then on New Year's Eve we drove to Madison and went to Sigrid and Matt's. Sigrid and Matt had made some fantastic food and o'duerves and we ate, Chuck came over, we drank, had champagne, got ready and finally headed out to Eric's Party. There we celebrated the New Year, and I saw Sarah and Dave, Ned, Andre's, Al Razor (who looks very different), met a few other nice people. We left later to go to the inferno, and stopped by to drop of the car, have more goodies at Sigrid's place, and then walk to the club. We got there and they had the bar sectioned off. The front was regular inferno fare, and the back had hiphop and rap!!! I saw lots of old faces that I havent' seen awhile, ordered a beer and realized much to my suprise that Bergoff Dark is now too dark for me. I had to switch to Rolling Rock. Stupid Chicago and it's expensive beer prices. We stayed until 4.00, and then walked home and crashed. Tired. So tired.

Got up at 11.30 the next day because Tim told his brother we would be home by 5.00....but decided that would be hard to do. So we called him and decided to just drive to Milwaukee and see him. He gave us Christmas presents! (he didn't have too, we didn't because of the every other year rule). He made us a painting out of a large piece of wood (neat!), we both got neck gaitors (made out of polar fleece), a year permit to Wisconsin State Parks, a book about snowshoeing, and his dad got us Christmas glasses and a sock saver. Which has now replaced the minature tea pot cushion pin as the weirdest/oddest present this year. We stayed for awhile, because I was motion sick, and then left when I was feeling slightly better..but we HAD to get food so I could get rid of the motion sickness all together. We drove the toll free way home and I crashed. I was so tired. I watched some TV, then fell asleep, got up and went to bed and feel asleep more. It was nice. Tim however, could not sleep which he attributed to not smoking yesterday. He even got up this morning and made breakfast, which was awesome because I was REALLY hungry.

And now here I am. Writing too much for even the brief version, and I still have to eat lunch and finish the longer version.