Real quickly now -- the technician was able to determine within 30 seconds that Crouton is a little girl. A very, active little girl whose eyes were open more than normal, and didn't stop moving. The technician tried for over an hour to get some good shots but Crouton just didn't cooperate. So, she said said I could go back in a month to try again -- free of charge. The baby will hopefully be fatter and have less room to squiggle around so that she can get the shots we were promised.

Okay. I decided to try my hand at Fallout. I've been itching for a video game to play for awhile, and Fallout has gotten any good reviews...and well we have it. So why not?

Yeah. Two girls. Sisters. What a concept huh?

I was going to watch another movie tonight from Netflix, but as it started my husband paused on his way to the kitchen to look at the screen. Once he realized I was watching The Ruins, which had just started, he said "I wanted to see that too." Sigh. Then a little tiff almost started about how I bulldoze my way through movies and no, no it's fine he doesn't need to see it anyway.

:P

I turned it off and ended up watching a Hallmark movie anyway -- and it wasn't even that good. I didn't even catch the name of it. The real purpose was to paint my toenails a nice deep red and hope that it will last a long time, because in the midst of doing so I realized it was much more difficult than it should have been. I later informed Tim that this was the last pedicure I am giving myself until after August. I think that means I will have to have it done by a professional sometime in between? But... you know I am really shy about that sort of stuff. I'll probably just end up trying to get it off myself with some polish remover and hope for the best.

Today I watched my friend's son Cullen for a couple hours. It was a tricky time -- 11-2 (with some of that her being around for) because that is "naptime." Morella was ready for a nap just as they came and was finishing up an early lunch. However company gave her a second and third wind. Times are changing for watching these two kids together. It used to be that Morella would just sort of follow him around the house with a concerned look on her face that he was going to steal the silver. Eventually she would leave him alone and they would do their own thing. This time, no no no -- Morella had to interact. I had to remove the doll stroller to stop them from fighting. Then Morella insisted on giving Cullen hugs and cuddles -- none of which he wanted. Therefore she ambushed him with hugs at least four times - three of which resulted in both of them crashing to the floor. For an hour, I took them both outside to run around and stay out of each other's wispy hair. Both kids got very dirty and I apologized to Hilary later over a delicious toasted sub. Anyway. I'm not sure what to think of this affectionate Morella -- I love it and yet I wish she would do it more with ME instead of other tots, cats and stuffed animals. ;)

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Morella drooled some more, I picked up around the place and then played with her in her room until Tim came home and I could make dinner. I had been sneaking in a few minutes at the computer when I heard her in the hallway clapping and looking at me. She had been playing her little piano in her room and needed to make sure I heard. It melted me heart, and so I dropped the computer and went to play with her. I colored and she worked on her funcube, and then later the stereo. She also made sure to stand on a few things. She love standing on things and balancing. She's like a little Chinese acrobat.

Oh oh, and at one point I asked her if she needed a diaper. She nodded yes, grabbed her crotch and then ran to the bedroom and started patting the changing pad. I was shocked! I picked her up and she did not utter one single protest as I changed a pretty wet diaper. This never happens! It also seems like she is learning and making up signs for things super fast these days. A short list of signs she is doing now:

--all done (hands like turning a door knob)
--hungry (patting mouth)
--down (pointing down)
--bedtime (blowing kisses -- she picked that up from her grandparents and apparently that means bedtime...)
more - (index finger pointed into opposite palm)
pick me up - (raising arms up)

Tim also said she has a sign for bath - pretend splashing

I think we are going to work on 'drink' next... or maybe the thirsty one? I don't know. Maybe we'll do both and see what she picks up first.

Anyway. Tomorrow is the day for reals...we hopefully get to see if Crouton is a boy or a girl. Tim is taking a half day and the appointment is at 3:00. Crouton sure is active -- right now we are going through the stage where the movements aren't all cute and cuddly. It's the being poked and prodded in my insides...where it feels like there shouldn't be poking and prodding going on. And they aren't kicks as much as s/he is flipping slowly and I can feel the entire movement occur -- which can feel weird. My stomach has gotten a lot harder and Morella has noticed the belly a few times. She seems to like taking care of other babies and her dolls, so I'm hoping she'll be a great big sister.

Okay. Potty and then bed. Look how late it is again!

It's weird to see the belly jump around --- and even weirder to feel it. These aren't kicks, these movements are the kid completely turning around.

Tim got Cinnamon Life cereal, frosted mini wheats and Nutty Nuggets. All good choices. The dish soap is an aromatherapy lavender scent. When you hand wash all dishes, it's gotta be something of a pleasure right?

I went to the post office today and finally got out a package I had been working on for over a year. Stopped at three little parks on the way there and home again with Morella who was, once again Crabby Pants extraordinaire and really, really wanted to go outside once she got up from her nap. This after we had gone out to the mall so I could buy a new purse to replace the ripped up one from the slide of doom last week. I ended up getting one from the Boston Store. They had a "steal" on a Fossil one for $50 dollars super on on clearance...but I found one for $21 that will do the same things and I don't have to worry about the leather getting ruined by spilled milk or whatever else it is I get covered in by the end of the day. I also got Morella some new onsies (from JC Penny) that are tagless, and some for the new neice. Morella picked out a pink and white fluffy dog -- ha ha she doesn't know that it's not for her. However, since she threw two huge tantrums about it today and was super blissfully happy and content to leave the store with it firmly in her arms, I have let her play with it. It also went to the post office with us. What a little nutcase.

Seriously though, why does she glom onto stuffed animals and dolls with such ferocity?

Anyway. She was drooling all day today. Morella never drools, so I am fairly certain teething is the culprit. Can I say she was being a picky eater too or does that get old? We had Salisbury steak (from the box), mashed potatoes (instant) and steamed broccoli and asparagus for dinner with on sale cheesecake for dessert. Tim said it's really good.

We watched Live Free or Die Hard while we worked on pet projects and now it's like super late and I should really go to bed. So should Crouton...and probably Tim. Tim goes to bed when I do...and I go to bed when he does. It's like we are ....what is that word when you are each others check system? Gah, I'm tired. I'm not making sense anymore.

Today was kind of a crappy day. I mean, I am grateful for any day that I have with family but you know some days are worse than others. I made cinnamon rolls for this mornings playgroup meeting and they were ... way too buttery. I should have known to cut the butter in half, but I was in a hurry and followed the recipe. The frosting was good though...

Morella was crabby and melted down on average, every 15 minutes about *something* all day with the exception of her two hour nap. A nap that I thankfully got a good 45 minutes of before she started her crabbiness again. The only time she didn't cry was when we went outside to play while dinner was cooking. Dinner. The dinner that ended up being thrown away whole. We have come to terms that we cannot cook a chicken in a bag. I tried it again and failed miserably. I think part of the reason is that we were going by the cooking guidelines of meat and cooking it until the temp reached 180. Well online, many sites said if you want a rubber chicken cook it to that temp but if you want a good chicken then cook it to 160 and check for doneness (pink). Sigh. From now on, I am only going to make whole chicken in a crock pot. Granted, I've only ever cooked cornish hens in a crock pot....but it's so hard to fail with crock pots, you know?

I was so disappointed and angry about dinner that I wanted to throw the entire bird through the window. Then I thought maybe there were some pregnancy hormones at play making it worse than it was...and of course that upset me even more :P Tim tried to cheer me up about it but in the end deemed it unusable and threw it away. I mean, it didn't even look like chicken meat and cutting it was like cutting through fabric. Therefore for dinner I had a bag leftover Easter M&M's, a snicker's ice cream bar and a vanilla pudding cup. The dinner of champs I know. Morella had sausage and peas. I would have eaten the same thing for dinner except I was still too angry and didn't have an appetite. Tim later went grocery shopping which was nice as I was able to watch some TV and catch up on the computer. He even put the food away! What a nice husband. :D

This past weekend we bought Morella and Crouton a Chariot double bike trailer. We had been researching which one to get for a couple of weeks, and now that the weather is better we made the plunge. We had some difficulty getting the helmet to finally fit Morella's miniature head, but ingenious use of padding on my part made it happen. So this year she gets it all to herself and next year, Crouton will be ready for it too! Hurray! Then we can go on those family biking trips Tim and I talked about before we had kids. :D

Speaking of Crouton, I am able to see the bottom of my belly button now. You see, I had a belly button hernia as a kid and had to have it surgically "fixed" which resulted in a very deep "innie." It's kind of funny, because Morella has a little bit of an outie -- nothing like I had though. Still, it's so strange to see the bottom of it. I wonder how much futher it's going to come out. How much shallower it's going to get.

Oh hey the photos link is working again. It was broken for a few days there because everything was switched over to another server. Well you heard me complain about computer problems. Gosh, it seems like the last week has been full of mood swings! It's like my patience level is at flood level and the slightest thing can push me over into Angryville. Just angry like helpless angry not like I want to smash things .....more like talk your ear off about it.

Last night I went over to Hilary's and hung out while working on some doubles I got for my Mom -- writing on the back. Tim had told me earlier that I should get out of the house because I was getting super depressed by how much my back hurt, and how nothing ever gets clean around here or stays that way for more than two minutes. I stayed until 11 before I went home and probably could have stayed longer just talking. It was nice to just hang out with someone who was doing something else and talk when we felt like it, over a variety of subjects. You know, it was just .... relaxing. Now if I could just find another friend who likes to play video games like that with me other than Tim.

Okay. I had put "fun cereal" on the grocery list, so I am going to see what Tim decided was fun cereal. Also, I put dish soap on the list and I an anxious to know what kind he got. Am I getting excited about home products? Sheesh.

Oh yeah. Morella and the worm. So last Friday there we are enjoying the glorious weather in the back yard. Morella wandering around doing her thing and me turning the garden over. There were lots of worms, so thinking back to my friend Jen's stories about worms and her son I saw this as 'teachable moment' and picked up a worm to show Morella. She looked down at the pink squiggly thing with curiosity and picked it up. I told her it was a worm, that it lived in the dirt and was kind of slimy. At that point she studied the worm and then ... started stretching it. Like pulling it apart and would have probably ripped it in half had I not screamed like a little girl in shock and disgust. I scared her a little bit but tried to change the subject, fully aware that I probably just scarred her for life. I informed Tim later that evening that he has a lot of work ahead of him in accumulating Morella into the world of creepy crawlies. I just can't hack it.

Morella and Migo Cuddle

(I just noticed the grubby face...man kids get dirty fast. I wonder what she was eating....and no she doesn't go to bed all grubbified).

Gah, I'm in the double digits! Tomorrow it will be only 96 days to go. Yikes!

No not really.

Hey I called my Mom because I was kind of lonely tonight and chatted with her. She was in good spirits so that was nice, and actually wanted to hear cute stories about Morella. I also had a mini fight with my brother regarding my loser brother and my Dad and his wife who sort of left him. Sigh. I feel so bad for the both of them -- Barb and my Dad. What a crummy situation.

It's pouring outside, and it's going to be thunderstorms for two more days. Ugh. I hope our basement holds up. I should also bring the starter plants out of the rain. I hope they aren't washed out or drowning by tomorrow. This gardening thing shouldn't be that hard, and yet it is.

Morella was a sweetheart today. She resisted the afternoon nap for an HOUR today but Tim and I were both tired so we outlasted her. We had gone to the Isthmus Green Day event at the Monona Terrace hoping for a good Machinery Row Coupon and were totally disappointed. No coupons. False advertising. I did get a nice LED night light though for the bathroom, and two little hippy/german type wooden toys for Morella. Other than that, it was a snooze. But back to my point, Morella was tired from that and fell asleep on the way home (just like yesterday) for ten minutes. She transferred to her crib okay and five minutes later was up and at em. Yesterday, that was the only nap she took all day. I was afraid the same thing was going to happen to today. Being an almost one and halfer is too young to give up naps.

I am really annoyed. Like really. For one, blogger won't tell me when and if the post is published. I am getting "it's taking longer than expected..." and it won't upload photos at all. Now it could be two things. One, blogger had issues with FTPing last week. And two, so did my domain and everything was transferred to a new server. Once I corrected the IP address, I was able to publish my blog, including the pictures. However, the pictures were actually from a work around (meaning it's published someplace else first). So really all that happened is text is working but the images are now not...make sense?

Good because it doesn't make sense to me. Something is fucking up in between the two and it's really got me agitated. I hate hate hate hate hate problems like this. It's not rocket science! I should be able to post crap, and have it publish. It's straightforward? Why do I keep having to trouble shoot these things? The last big troubleshoot like this was back at the end of December and then it was bloggers fault. I don't care who is at fault, I just want things to work and to stop being do fucking technical. I am really tempted to switch to Wordpress or something else where apparently these problems don't happen as much. :( It's like I am being punished for hosting my own stuff instead of putting it on blogspot.

This day was just really crappy, blogging problems aside. The park we went today sucked for the kids. I went down the slide because Morella kept insisting on climbing the playtower of doom by herself and my purse caught on the top of the slide and nearly strangled me -- in the process ripping my new purse in half and leaving a nasty red bruise on my neck. The doctor appointment for Morella was apparently yesterday, I found out as I was there today. They were able to fit us in. Morella's ears are perfect, she now weighs 19lbs and 1 oz, and she gets one more ear infection before we think about an ENT referral. She assured me that both she and the ENT would say that the likilihood of her getting more ear infections is low because we are heading into spring and summer season.

Guess who has a runny nose, is sneezing a ton....crap, who is apparently still awake at 8.32 ... didn't have good naps today, and didn't eat much dinner? Morella. Hilary says maybe she had allergies or is teething. I think she is probably getting a cold because it's just the way my day is going.

I don't know. In some ways the day was okay. Trader Joes with her was fun. A clean bill of health was nice. I got my flonase prescription refilled. The park after the doom tower was abandoned was okay, I was chastized for some admin decisions I made regarding a listserv .... and yet I feel down and rotten and ... why can't things just WORK!? I don't want to have to figure out how to fix it. I want it to be fixed right now because it's supposed to work.

GAH!!!!!!!!!

ANd one more thing, I realized the other day that crossing my legs is starting to get difficult. OH and the bathroom rag rug I was working on -- an oval shape -- sucks and and I am now taking it apart to go back to the trusty rectangle. But you see wasted time and energy AGAIN!

Did I mention we are finding out if Crouton is destined to wear pink or blue next Thursday at 3:00? Well we are. Make your guess --- your extension is about to expire. ;) I'm excited because we get to bring Morella, and because it's a 3D ultrasound. It will be kind of cool to see what the baby looks like.

Speaking of babies. SIL Kandace and BIL Phil had their baby this morning -- Eden Pearl was born weighing 5 lbs and 14 oz, and is 18 inches long. Once again the Benninghoff template prevails (small babies). Eden was having some respiratory problems and was taken to NICU. That is all I know. Apparently Caleb -- her older brother had similar problems. But they had a girl! I was predicting boy, and that they would have the baby tomorrow. I was close!

The part where your nose attaches to your head is bugging me. For the last two days I noticed if I bent down to pick something up, it would be bizzy there and I would start to feel funny. Last night, I realized that my flonase prescription ran out. I wonder if the return of rhinitis is causing this issue...it really kind of sucks.

.....

This point has been hijacked by Tim.

Isn't the weather getting nice? Forecast of 81 for Friday! That will be nice. And with nice weather comes bugs, and that means more bugs to collect for my artwork. When it comes to beer, I'm a pretty big fan of stouts and IPAs. Inline skating always seems to make me feel...sublime. Uh oh, she's back.

......

Thanks Tim.

So I was going to tell you the story about Morella and a worm. I guess I'll save that for tomorrow because Tim just started up Dynasty Warriors and you know we are addicted. It's so relaxing!

I watched Resident Evil: Degeneration tonight. It was animated installment ... and it was okay. It was better than the movies, I daresay. For some reason I just can't get scared by zombies. Ghosts are another story though. After that I spent time on the internet and just now caught myself looking at photos on Facebook. MUST STOP! My time could be better spent blogging, right?

Today was okay. I got up. Showered, dressed -- nice even. I wore a black wraparound maternity dress and tights! Yowza. Morella wore a cute pink skirt, colorful polka dotted baby legs, and a pink and red striped hoodie. It strikes me now that that polka dots and stripes probably don't match, but really it was all the pink that drew it together. We went to the library for a playdate. It was okay -- Morella mostly seemed shell shocked again and sort of wandered around. She didn't have that normal joy she usually has exploring. I think it was because there ended up being too many kids. I got some books and went to have lunch with one of the other ladies at Java Cat afterward. I mostly went for the Gelato because Morella really likes it.

Got home, changed her, had lunch and then put Morella down for a nap. She's been amazing communication wise the past two weeks. Did I mention she started signing for "more" and that she she now nods her head yes in affirmation to things that are true -- like there being poop in her pants or if she wants to take a nap? On the other hand if you ask her if she wants a new diaper she'll say "no". Of course, she says no to many things, even as she yanks it out of your hand or opens her mouth for another bite.

Yesterday she burped long and loud and we all had a good five minute belly laugh about it. It was so funny to laugh and watch her look between Tim and I and just laughing...then we when were done she tried to fake burping and started chuckling again. You know, just like when you are getting over a really good laugh, you'll remember it a few seconds later and laugh some more? Like that.

More Morella stuff:

--she loves being outside and was really disappointed that we didn't go out to play today. There was one creepy moment, after her nap she was crying and kept pointing to the door. I took her to the door and she tried to open it. I opened it and there we stood looking out into the cold for about 30 seconds when the UPS truck suddenly pulled up in front of the house, a man emerged carrying a box and he brought it up to the front door where I took it from him. It was like Morella was physic!

---we got a back up solution for all our pictures and little videos of Morella...and uh other important data on the computer. It's nice to have a back up.

--Morella loves puppies, kitties and stuffed animals. No this is not a plea for more stuffed animals. Really, we have enough. And with garage sale season upon us, we are bound to get more because people always give away a free stuffed animal to her after watching her roll around on the blanket of stuffed animals in toddler heaven. This years collection has started with a small puppy.

--She has a doctor appointment on Thursday. I am looking forward to seeing if she has gained any weight from her eating last week and this week. It's so nice to have a baby who EATS!

---Morella loves steamed broccoli, sausage (like kielbasa, hotdog, patties, etc), cream cheese and 8th continent's vanilla soy milk.

-- I was just remembering today to where we were last year. I was pumping like all day, Morella needed thickeners in all her bottles and I was so worried that she would never be able to swallow normally and that her reflux would plague us forever. I am so glad we are past that phase.
________________________

Next Thursday we find out if Crouton is a boy or a girl. I set up an appointment with Baby's Debut for Thursday at 3:00PM. We get to bring Morella so that will be nice. So if you haven't gotten a guess in yet -- do it now!

Crouton has been super active. Last night was the first night that I hurt sleeping though. My hips kept aching, my back hurt...ugh it was miserable. I got up several times to shift and try to get comfortable.

Speaking of which, who do I think I am staying up this late? I wasn't able to get a nap in earlier because the neighbors renovating the house next door thought it was a good time to deposit a large metal garbage bin and then throw bricks into it for the next hour -- it was SO loud and I was so crabby about it. Maybe that's why Morella was so crabby after nap. She didn't get a good solid sleep in.

Saturday Photos: Belly shots at 25 weeks

I'm having problems uploading photos in conjunction with my domain -- but I found a work around for now. I hate technical problems. You know? That make me nervous because I don't feel as on top of computer internet stuff as I used to be. Albeit, back in the dark ages it was a lot easier because everything was so simple. Now...gah...there is just so much that it's impossible to even pick a direction to follow. Like I would love to redo my website, but I don't have dreamweaver anymore and...doing it myself is just too big and I am too snotty to even think about using a lame template. Well, you know without any extras special stuff that is.

In other news, I woke up this morning clutching my glasses and something else. I put them on the nightstand and went bak to sleep. When I woke up for real later because I had to pee, the cats were in muntiny and the dog was whining to go out, I discovered that they were really messed up. All bent to heck and ... grubby. How on earth did I end up doing that with my glasses? That has never happened. It reminds me of the time I woke up and swallowed an ear plug with a big drink of water like it was a vitamin. Sigh.









[corrected ip address...attempting now...]

It was a busy day. Morella did not follow her regular nap schedule so I ended up waking her up twice, once after she had only been asleep for 10 minutes. I hated to do it, but I didn't feel like I could cancel our plans. I had hoped she would take a nap later -- but she didn't. So I consoled myself by putting her to bed 15 minutes early. Something that would have been much easier if it hadn't been sunny out. It seemed like today I really noticed for the first time that the sun was still shining at 7:15. I pulled the shades and went along with the bed time routine but I still heard her talking in there at 8:00PM.

I kind of wanted to go bed myself early because I'm tired. I just feel feel weird about going to sleep before Morella. You know? I prefer her to be asleep at night before I am, unless Tim is around. However, he is at his Thursday night game.

This morning we went to the East Side Mom's club spring picnic. For about 20 minutes Morella stood shell shocked -- probably from too short of a nap -- clutching her springer webkinz dog that she insists on taking with her whenever she leaves the house. After she loosened up she went into Morella mode and just wandered around, looking a people, other kids, trees, or whatever caught her fancy. She's such a little free spirit. :D Since it was a special occassion, I let her have one of the small juice boxes that someone had brought. I was really suprised and proud to see that she was able to take the small straw out of the juice box and put it back in to take a sip! Way to go fine motor control!

The afternoon was our regularly scheduled Thursday playgroup. We met at a local park and the kids just kind of wandered around. Morella climbed a lot, and then just as I said to two other women that she hates swinging, she went up to Ann and had her put her in a swing and then started laughing as she was pushed. Great Morella, thanks for making me look like a liar. Eventually it became obvious that she was tired because she was getting slap happy. I had hopes of getting home to sneak in a nap, but dashed those plans when I saw it was 5:00 when I got home. Nutz. She ate a cheese cake cup, grapes and bologna for dinner and I ordered pizza and chicken kickers for Tim and I. She also had a few bites of pizza -- cool! Maybe one day she'll like it, right?

Anyway. I don't feel like I have anything to say. I sort of just want to go to bed. Morella is asleep now, I am sure of it, so I could. Today was the last day of her antibiotics. Thank goodness. I still haven't called to make an appointment with Baby's Debut for the 3d ultrasound. Tomorrow, I hope. I want to make sure that Morella gets as much sleep as she wants so I'll stick around the house and play outside in the back yard. I think we need disposable diapers soon, but that can wait until this weekend and we can make it a family trip. Sometimes being on the go all day/week makes me kind of want to just stay home. Besides, she loves our backyard just as much as any other place.

Tomorrow night we are meeting with a bunch of friends for a fish fry. I want to make sure she is as rested as can be for this evening out. Other than that, we don't have any plans for the weekend. It looks like it might be rainy. Maybe we'll work on the garden space. I plan on marking off the garden spot and enclosing it with bricks to make it look nice and offical. Since Morella loves spending time outside (as do we) we figured that we would make a big effort to work on the yard and make it really nice.

At the play group today we decided that we are going to have a Mom's night out. So next Tuesday we are leaving the babies to their Daddy's and heading out to have dinner at the Brass Ring at 6:30. Because you know, if we have to put them to bed then it really isn't a complete Mom's night out now is it? I'm really glad that I have been able to meet such an interesting collection of new Mom's this past year.

I don't feel different than the person I was before Morella came here, and yet at the same time she has opened up a ton of doors and opportunities (people and places) that I probably never would have met or done otherwise. It's great and weeks like this one, make weeks like the last worth it.

You know how it is. Morella got better on Friday and aside from Tim getting sick and pissing me off to no end, life is great. oh it wasn't personal, you just know how men are when they get sick. *rolls eyes* Yeah. I don't remember the last time I got to spend the entire day in bed because I wasn't feeling great. :P

Anyway. The weekend was good and he was well enough on Sunday to travel. We went to his parents and had a bucket load of easter and lots of food.

Monday I had my prenatal appointment. I gained 9-10 pounds in a month. !!!! Yeah. Since then I have decided to try and eat healthier and do my best to get more walking in. I mean exercise is supposed to help with the pain -- even though it's painful to walk. But hopefully there is a pay off at some point. Right? It was a super busy day because I visited with Lowen who babysat Morella (who slept the entire time) while I was at the appointment, followed by a visit with Laima, babysitting Cullen and later on chatting with Hilary and the two girls when she came to pick him up.

Today, Morella woke up in a fantastic mood and has stayed that way all day. She ate a ton today and was super good. I love these days. I wish they could all be like this. We walked to the library and on the way stopped into to visit her neighbor friend Leo and Emily. Leo was sleeping so it was mostly me visiting with Emily while Morella ran around like a bunny hollering "dop dop dop". At the library she walked around with a horton hears a who thing, before we went to Java Cat to visit with Laima and get a beverage. I got Morella teeny bit of gellato -- it was just a big sample bit because they don't sell tiny sizes and the small for 3.15 is really too big for me. When she was done with her tablespoon, she held out her little cup for more -- several times.

Walked home and took the short cut across the field. I stopped to let her out and walk a bit, and in the process of doing so the stroller fell backward from the weight of the diaper bag and books. My barely touched lemonade splashed to the ground and was gone within seconds. Sucked up by the dry earth. All that remained was sparkling ice cubes.

I made a dinner of a salad with eggs (from Laima) for us, and mac and cheese with peas for Morella, with some steamed broccoli. Then we took Pluto for a walk -- in part to keep Morella up who wanted to go to bed at 6.30. She was ramped up be the end of the walk (overtired) and resisted bed. Now when pajamas are mentioned she runs in the opposite direction. She went to bed at 7.30 -- whew. I hope that means she'll sleep until 7. She's been getting up around 6.00 - 6.30 lately. Ugh. TOO EARLY! All that walking zonked me out and so I took an hour and half nap on the couch that might have been longer had Tim not said "Go to bed" and then had a disagreement with me regarding the state of leftovers in the fridge. :P

Okay. I gotta go to bed. I think I am going to hit the East side Mom's play group tomorrow since it's with a woman I kind of know (from the group). And you know, I am hungry again but I really shouldn't eat anymore today. Especially because that "friend" of mine -- Hilary brought over a dozen, assorted, still warm donuts as a thank you for baby sitting yesterday. A DOZEN and they were still warm. It would have been a crime to not eat one...thank goodness I capped it at two. It was tough though. I made her take two upon arrival so that is two less to worry about. I am looking forward to breakfast though! Off to bed with me.

Saturday Photos: Easter egg hunt! (our first)

Morella helps Noah put eggs into his basket. She didn't bother bringing her. Her Mom convinced her it would be useless and she didn't want to keep picking it up for her.

Woah! Morella picked up two eggs on her own. Well...one at a time.

Leo showed up for the action, and so we got a quick shot of all three of them in the same camera frame. It's gets harder the older they get.

Creeping closer....touching.....

Morella and I

The onslaught begins!

Morella and Tim on a grey spring morning atop her new play thing.

Our neighbors got one of those really nice wooden playswing sets and gave their old, outgrown plastic set to Morella. She loves it!

Down with a rotovirus. :(

BACON!

Friends forever. :D

Morella is sleeping and I have started to make dinner. Tonight we are going to have chicken casserole: egg noodles, a can of cooked chicken, mixed veggies, mostly mozzerella (uhh I need more cheese) a smidge of colby and a dash of parmesean (make it interesting) and a can of cream of something.

Today is slightly better than yesterday. She is still in the pants she woke up in -- I've decided to think of them as her lucky turtle pants, but I'm not sure that they will have survived her nap. Yesterday Morella blew through six pairs of pants. Speaking of which I should probably wash that stuff before her room smells even more like a port a potty.

She's taking a big nap today -- thank god she and I need it. Sleep is restorative right? Sleep makes you heal faster, helps your immune system. The best way to recover from something is to get as much sleep as possible. Thereby, I encourage her sleeping. I really hope she's feeling better by tomorrow with a good three days of antibotics into her.

Tim has tomorrow off but he's probably going to use part of it to go Janesville and hang out with people he's barely seen or talked in the last 20 years. Hey I should use this for leverage to see if we can fanagle something to visit my friend in Appleton for Saturay ... I should even see if she available for the possiblity of it.

Aw crap I heard talking in her room. Why does she always wake up just as I am about to boil something? My water is ready....

I'm feeling a little near crazy. Today is just another endless day of crying and unhappy kid. To try and make a difference, I at least changed her into clothes today instead leaving her in pajama's, but it's not working. She's still unhappy, very short fused, cries a lot. A lot.

She did eat some pears today, and most of a yogurt and some cream cheese. That is quite an improvement. She has bad diarrhea though. I know it goes hand in hand with antibiotics. I almost didn't want to give her today's dose -- but theoretically it's that antibiotic that is going to start helping her feel better. So today is today two. I pray to god that she is starting to feel better by tomorrow. I don't know how much more of this I can sanely take.

Okay. Deep breath. Having a frazzled, upset Mom sure as heck isn't going to make her feel better. Okay. Take care of myself. What do I need to do that? *thinks* Cleaning helps. I should clean. It makes me feel in control of something. My hair is also bothering me. I should take a shower. Yeah. Then what?

--cook something
--clean the bathroom
--sweep living room floor?

These are too vague. I'll start with the shower first. That is something that is finite and definite. Morella is laying down in her crib. She isn't sleeping. The door is open. I put in her favorite stuffed animals. She just wants to lay there. That's okay -- if it makes her feel better. :( I gave her motrin at 10:30 but it does't seem to be helping much.

I wish a food fairy would drop some food off for me. Something delicious.

Update: Morella is now not going to wear onsies (just the onsie t-shirt material thing), a shirt and pants. That last explosion was near hazmat level. Also, it's going to be hard to get anything done when Morella is so needy. So maybe the cleaning plan won't work.

So the fluid in her left ear at last Thursday's appointment DID turn into a nasty ear infection. Just like I thought it would. What I didn't expect was for it to be completely resistant to the antibiotic that she was on that was supposed to prevent it from happening. It's a good thing I didn't give it to her this morning. Instead she took a dose of the new antibiotic, got some motrin, ate two fries and most of a apple fig bar and now she is taking another nap.

There we have it. Ear infection...again. I have a follow up appointment set with her pediatrician later this month. Morella has gotten an ear infection every single time she has had a cold. She had mentioned the possiblity of a referral to ENT to discuss tubes. I guess we'll see what happens. Tubes are better than over exposure to antibotics right?

Morella woke up late. She slept until 7.45, got up and drank 5 ounces. Then she didn't want to be put down. Tim carried her into the bedroom where she just laid on the bed (something she never does). Listless. He changed her diaper. Dry as a bone. Temperature still low grade and there. She still bothers her right ear. There is a white circle of something in her crib -- it doesn't smell like vomit and yet part of her hair is matted again this morning. I think it's drool or spit up? He put her to bed without a peep, and shut the door.

I called the doctor and now have an appointment for 10:30 at Urgent Care. She is still sleeping. Why does this keep happening?

Tim's theory is that she is still sick. The antibiotics she got are too strong for her. I feel like she's a goldfish. You know, when you have fish they get sick and die and you don't know why.

Last night while battling for the good of all across the Dynasty we heard a strange noise come from Morella's room. I motioned for Tim to turn the TV to mute and we listened. Morella was crying softly and he went to her door to listen better. She cried for about a minute more and then stopped. Not a peep was heard from her the rest of the night.

I laid in bed this morning, and tried to stretch out my time as long as possible, waiting for Morella to run down the hallway and gobble something at me before pitterpattering away. However, when Tim walked into her room to give Morella her morning sippy of vanilla soy I heard "Oh no." Followed immediately by a froggy cry. Oh no? Oh crap.

"Did she throw up?" I asked and slipped my feet into my dirty white slippers.

"Yeah," he replied glumly. "Can you get me a washcloth?"

I went to the bathroom and turned on the hot water, filling the sink and tossing in a wash cloth. Afterward I walked into her room to get the sheet, stuffed animals and blankets out of her crib and threw them down the chute. Since I got a cold this past weekend, my sense of smell is 1/4 it's normal capacity, and that wasn't even working during this. Tim carried Morella back, and I saw her hair was covered with dried puke.

"She slept in it," he said. I knew we both felt bad.

"Maybe I should take a shower with her," I said. She hates baths and a shower would be much faster.

"Okay," he said. I took her and got her undressed, and took her temperature while he recovered in the living room. Her temp was 100.4. Down from the 101.9 it was the previous evening. It wasn't until I was about to get into the shower with her that I finally caught a whiff of the smell and understood while Tim was dry heaving. It was just vomit people, not like it was the worst vomit in the world. Geez. I guess I can thank my lucky stars for that stupid cold now? Nah...

She cried softly throughout the shower and gabbled at me. I'm sure it was something along the lines of "No, take me out of here. No, I don't want to be here. I'm not dirty. I'm fine. I don't mind it. Stop the wet."

Eventually I did, and she was handed over to Tim who got her dressed. She seemed like she was in a great mood. Talking, smiling, and being animated. Later on, I realized I forgot to wash the ear that was mashed into the pile of barf and so despite a wet washcloth wash later, we still have the faint aroma of vomit. Like I said, thank goodness my nose is stuffed up for the most part. That is until I try to sleep, but that's another story that isn't very interesting.

I cancelled our morning play group plans again, and settled into hanging out the house. I thought it was going to be easy as pie because she was in such good spirits. She was acting like a million bucks! Let's just say that by the end of the day she was more like $5.50. Barely ate anything, slept a lot, crabby, clingy, wanted to lay in her bed...she was only better after we gave her some motrin and played well after her "dinner." We even let her stay up an extra 50 minutes because her last nap was so long (1:30-5:00).

On the upside, I got in a really good nap myself. Kind of makes up for the crappy sleep I've been getting the last couple of days. The round ligament pain is just .... ugh. The latest flare up has me hobbling around the house like an old lady.

If she has a temperature tomorrow morning, we'll take her in to the clinic again. I'm thinking it was a stomach bug. I hope this is the last we see of ANY sickness until next fall. Cold and flu season? You are fired!

Hey guess what? I'm sick again. Blast it all. Tim gave it to Morella, who had it all week and now it's finally my turn. I knew we should have just all licked each other as soon as Tim had gotten it. On the bright side, it seems to not be as bad as Tim's was -- however Morella is on a new round of antibiotics for the fluid in her ear that we all know would have turned into a raging ear infection at 6:01 PM this evening.

She's still snotty and not napping today. She went down at lunch but coughing fits kept her awake and that fucking cat -- Migo's howling finished off any hopes of a nap after I had given her honey. Sometimes I really hate my cats. I mean it. I decided to go outside then, and we spent an hour in the back yard. She went down her new slide a few times, wandered around played with balls and I cut back wild grape vines that obscures my garden bed. Yeah I think I'll do a garden this year. It will be a good reason to be outside and something to do while Morella wanders. I'll get starters though...is that what they are called? When it's already started for you? I can't do just planting seeds because the weeds grow faster than the plants and I don't know which is which until it's too late. I wouldn't mind herbs...a bunch more of basil, rosemary etc...

Still not napping. My soundscape CD isn't cutting it this time. I have a raging headache that just started out of nowhere. This is like the third time that's happened in the last three weeks. My blood pressure is always okay at the doctor's though...I'll guess we'll see on the 13th.

I went to subway for lunch today and brought it home. It wasn't as good as usual because I couldn't taste much. Morella ate a good Morella lunch. That leaves us with dinner. Ugh. I am so sick of thinking of meal after meal after meal. I've been cheating and eating out at lot -- and the other day we got Outback Takeout (best meal I've had in months!). I feel so guilty getting more takeout but I am having such a hard time constantly making dinner right now, especially when Morella doesn't eat it!

Oh the doctor said she had a slightly red throat, so that and her two new teeth and being sick probably put a damper on her eating THIS time. But doesn't it seem like I am always trying to find excuses for her poor eating? She weighs 18lbs and 7 oz. She gained four ounces since the 23 of Feb.

Sigh. Can I go lay down now? Is she sleeping? It's been quiet for about five minutes....should I even bother trying?

OH and here some pictures.




The last one is Morella getting "stuck" under the green coffee table. Sheesh.

She is banging her crib. No naps for me. :(

Also to answer Zoey's question of would I hire myself circa 1995 to baby sit Morella .... and the answer is yes! I'm awesome.

Another grey, dreary day. We all slept in late this morning. Tim until 7.30. Morella until 7.55, and me until 8:00. It was weird. Morella went down for a nap at 9.30. She's still a snot factory -- it comes out like volcanic eruptions every 1/2 hour or so, then I have to face her wrath by coming after her with a tissue. That new lifescapes CD I got at Target the other day has been awesome -- I put her down, and play it in the living room where she can still hear it lightly and she sleeps. It is rather soothing.

Oh crap I have diapers in the wash...hold on. Crap. My foot fell asleep and is in the process of pins and needles so I can't move it. I'll wait a few minutes before going to put them in the dryer. I also need to wash some of her bedding. Yesterday she tried to cram herself into a small plastic tub and fell over bashing her inner lip. Soon thereafter she knocked down a small bookshelf (I was rearranging) and it must have have reactivated the cut because her sheets had blood all over them. OH it's better now.

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I went to bed early last night at 9:30. I think I went to sleep right away -- which is always nice. I had lots of vivid dreams - also nice. Since I went to sleep early I have no big desire to rush back to bed and nap, especially since she started her nap so early. I need to figure out someway to turn this day around. I am tired of feeling all cooped up and bluesy because of a sick kid and depressing weather. I almost feel inclined to putz around the house. You know do things like fix a few pictures and hang them up. Straighten up some bookshelves. Dust.

Yesterday my throat was a bit scratchy, and today I am starting to feel a little stuffy nosed....I hope I am not getting sick. Maybe this is the worst it will be.

I wish I had more interesting things to say. I really do. The rag rug I am working on is turning into a epic craft because of how much material the monster requires. I haven't finished crocheting the lastest batch of cut up and sewn stripes, but I have a feeling it isn't going to be enough and then I am going to have to hunt for more appropriate discarded clothes/rags, etc around the house to feed it. When it's done it's going to be super nice for the kitchen though. I have two large towels I want to turn into a bathroom rag rug -- I need to refresh myself on how to crochet a circle though.

Alright, well. I guess I'm going to go and put a bra on and change my clothes from the ones I wore yesterday. That should help in differentiating yesterday from today. At least it's Wednesday now -- better yet, at least it's April.

Happy April Fool's.