"I have to do something," Hadjare muttered to herself. The cold wind tugged at her scarf and blew through the button gaps in her coat. She shoved her hands deeper in her pocket and focused walking over snow covered ice without taking a second spill. That morning while navigating between two parked SUV's she had suddenly found herself on the ground wondering what happened. The whole of the pavement was covered in black ice and getting up again required the assistance of two side mirrors.

Work has passed rather quickly that morning with a steady steam of clerical duties. Between photocopying 32 double-sided, three page handouts on buff paper and faxing an advertisement for an upcoming seminar she felt a faint flutter to the left side of her mind. It had been a long time since that larvae last disturbed any dust in her brain. She pushed it aside and concentrated on sneaking peeks at other people's electronically published lives.

By the time her key turned the golden lock on her front door the larvae had graduated into a full blown moth of discontent. It batted madly around the small confine and knocked loose buds of creativity. Visions of a grand apocalyptic epic, complete with a annotated guide book on How to Survive the End of the World to writing a fairly obscure author swirled around one another. "I can't do both," Hadjare reasoned and watched her two dogs eat a high-quality lunch. "Only one could reasonably be completed in one afternoon."

The battle royal tired her and she decided to take a short afternoon nap. She awoke an hour later to a barking dog five feet from the bed. "What the hell is going on?" she hollered and fumbled to put her glasses on. As her vision cleared a black dog ran out of the room and a smug white dog turned her attention to a pile of high-quality vomit, jazzed up with small curd cottage cheese lying in a forlorn pile at the side of the bed. "Oh no you don't," she menaced and kicked the dog out with small slam of the bedroom door. Luckily, a roll of paper towels was at hand from the last time a dog as expelled something. Ripping apart four sheets she laid it over the steaming pile and scooped it up one fell sweep.

"That's it," she said to the garbage. "I'm going to write China Mieville a post card he will probably never get."

Yesterday I was unspeakably naughty.

Today is going okay. Again this winter can be done. I want out...I want spring. I am glad that today's Friday because that means the weekend goes by quick and then all of a sudden it's Monday (which is generally a blur) and then BAM it's March. With March in session I can actually FEEL how close spring is...today I am just wishing that it was unseasonably warm. Wouldn't that be nice?

So yeah. Marvels -- I liked it, but it wasn't something that I had never seen before. The format and style of the stories is a lot like Astrocity...which was written by Kurt Busiek and a some of the artwork is from Alex Ross. In fact I thought "Hey this isn't a totally new concept at all--the human quality of superheros -- their problems, laymans perspectives, etc" until I realized that Marvels came BEFORE Astrocity. Hmm...how about that? I guess I really like the ... realistic panels...it takes me a lot longer to go through them because I enjoy looking at the pictures so much. And who doesn't like looking at superhero's/freaks in a new way. I do think I might have enjoyed it a lot more if I knew the whole comic book history of all the characters...I had to constantly reference Tim to get the full scoop on what really happened -- for example with Galactus.

And no I haven't read Neil Gaiman's 1602 -- that has just entered my recommendation list right after Iron Council.

As for Hellraiser...you know it the was first time that Tim and I watched it through. I had always seen bits and pieces of it on TV -- so I knew the general idea of what happened. OF course they edited the naughty bits on TV... I also watched it while making breakfast and doing dishes -- as with any horror movie you don't need to put your FULL attention on it. I guess it was okay. It could totally be done a play. I was thinking lately that I would be interested in becoming a teacher if I could lead the drama club in their choices of plays and direct them -- I would do Dawn of the Dead for sure...I should keep a running list of movies that could easily be plays. Speaking of which I get to watch the new remake this weekend, as well as I Robot, and Napolean Dynamite (which I haven't seen). Tim said it's about nerds...and that it's probably going to be painful more than funny. I guess for him...I most certainly never considered myself a nerd.

Video games include replaying Champions of Norath on harder levels -- there is a new one out but we have been unable to find it used yet. Ghost Recon -- working through new levels...and Tim just bought another one used yesterday called...I forget. Something about the old west and he plays a bounty hunter...again. The last game he played Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath was oldwesty and he was a bounty hunter. I expect we will just play more of that...

I managed to get on the ball and write a few more letters...although as soon as I send one out I get some. Not that I am complaining...just makes catching up a tad bit more challenging. I just think it's probably because some people hadn't heard from me in like two months...so writing back was easy and interesting.

Battlestar is on tonight -- ahh...
I am addicted to Lost too.
ER finally started over on TNT primetime in the day time...once shows start over I lose interest in them...even if I haven't seen all the episodes. I thought it was interesting to see how fuzzy and soap opery it was in the beginning and how young George Cloony is before I switched the station to catch Mr Brightside by the Killers on VH1...and swooned only slightly.

There isn't much for me to eat when I get home. I guess maybe I will buy something downtown and leave a tad bit early to do that. After all it is Friday and I have things I want to work on when I get home. I guess I will just have to go to Chipotle...oh the horror!

I am SO sick of looking Village/Township/City of -address ON the little places that actually have a website. I can't tell you how many times I go to a website only to see that they tell me their longitude and lattitude, or how many miles they are away from some other place, or give a street address with no zip code...or phone numbers with no area code....or no address at all. Because apparently everybody knows it.

What the hell...how could you forget that information...it seems like it would one of the easiet most important ones to include. So I started to complain on the sites with anonymous forms. :) That makes me feel only a tiny bit better. More later...

Friday - Walked dogs, went to Barnes and Nobles to buy the Dark Knight Returns (for Andrew) and Marvels (for myself and Tim -- half way through it and it's brilliant!) and a Battlemech? Tech? book for Tim. Stopped at Preplayed to look around and found nothing. Got subway - went home and watched Scifi Friday.

Saturday - Went to Geneva to walk dogs. Did alot of dog walking but it was a day of bloody tails. We ended up taking two dogs to the Vet, and kept one to take back to Madison for someone else to foster. Napped. Ate dinner, watched Hellraiser and Shaun of the Dead, drank wine and read.

Sunday - Watched cable movies, worked on cross stitch, poncho and letters, made a pot roast dinner, walked our own dogs in the early morning snow and did lots of reading.

Monday - sitting here at work faxing crap all over the state of wisconsin and 'researching' cities, villages and townships. Woo. Big fun. Planning on some laundry when I get home. My favorite fleece jammies went down the shoot last night and they can't stay down the basement long -- they get lonely for me.

Thanks ta Jen fo` this site but real niggaz don't give a fuck. I jiznust couldn't resist giv'n you a friznesh look at mah entry fo` today. ;) You can do it yoself at Gizoogle.com IT's just that much fun in tha mutha fuckin club.

Already I am on mah second cup of joe --- wizzell wizzle I say already I D-to-tha-izzont' really mizzy tizzy it was THAT bad, it is almost 11:00 fo` heaven's sake and yo momma. SuperBoss brought in some kind of bread tizzy her Mom baked motha fucka. It has coconut in it n it's sweet, but SuperBoss thinks thizzay it is zuchinni bread anyway. Maybe it is...zuchini is like pear juice in tizzle it can go in almost anyth'n . Im crazy, you can't phase me.

James, is you sure Timbuktu isn't a real place? Is tizzy what you weed-smokin' coz tha names thizzay Hilary mentioned ARE real. I have been ta Kalamazoo (which wasn't Tizzy mizzle fun -- contrary ta whizzat they mizzight believe) . Slap your mutha fuckin self. But seriously, Timbuktu? I did a quick search n came up wit a hotel/rizzles -- whizzich is generally a good indication tizzy you M-to-tha-izzight be right . Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your motherfuckin' dome.

Anyway. Noth'n snoopa messin' planned fo` this weekend fo shizzle. The Little is back (there was a family death) so we should probably do sum-m sum-m whizzay him. Speak of rizzle life shawty gangsta I haven't gotten anyth'n fo` Andrew yet with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back. We is going ta do it today with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. Maybe Cat's Mizzle wizzle deign ta be open. We is going ta tha mizzy ta git tha book at Barnes n Nobel n some funky ass coffee...I decided going ta Hot Topic on a Friday night is just a wanna be gangsta wait'n ta happen . Holla!.

I finally gots around ta Fram'n shot calla in law's (French Greg)'s artwork tizzy I gots bizzle in Pimp . Chill as I take you on a trip. You see I had gotten it...then put it away until I found some cheap good frames...which I did find a few months baller -- but by tizzy I had forgotten tha safe place where I had put his artwork n shit. It's T-H-to-tha-izzat how it goes?

IT's up now n look'n pretty good. I am think'n of hustla art we can do n thought of saggin' Hilary some canvas or sum-m sum-m so tizzle she could paint sum-m sum-m up. I could buy you a paint brizzay or sum-m sum-m too if tizzy helps? Wizzy say you?

I just found out that Shangri La is not real.
I don't believe it.

Thanks to those who gave suggestions for fabric. I think I will rip up some old pants...I know have a pair or two of those that there is no hope for ever wearing again. ANd I think I could use the denim as a liner (cos it's ugly) and put the calico on the outside. Yeah..something like that.

Dangit, I went to Cat's Meow today -- and missing my bus by moments because I did...only to see that it was closed. wtf. I make the effort and they are closed. That is one thing I hate about small businesses...they get to set their own hours and therefore are always unreliable. So instead, I am going to the mall this evening to get a graphic novel and a 'cool' t-shirt from Hot Topic for my little brother's birthday. It's actually tomorrow and this stuff will never arrive in time -- but it's close enough. What' better than getting a surprise package in the mail. And since I never consistently remember his birthday -- it's going to be a double whammy.

I think I am going to make him some brownies and send them too. Yeah, good idea.

So I ended up taking the number 5 bus because it said it would eventually end up at the east transfer point. This is the third random bus I have taken that kind of gets me close to where I live. I will master the bus routes for the east side of Madison before the year is out. After I got deposited at the East Tranfer point I walked over to Woodman's and bought some fruit, cottage cheese, beef liver, Diet Vanilla Cherry Dr. Pepper (dude, with three flavors fighting each other .... it's hard to really say HOW it tastes -- it tastes like Diet Dr. Pepper to me), brownie mix, pita pockets and trail mix. Maybe I will make chicken salad tonight (whatever tonight's dinner is is always tomorrow's lunch). Or maybe chicken egg salad...that sounds good too.

I went to the mall yesterday too and was totally uninspired to buy anything. I think it's because I was having a bad fashion day ... and I had forgotten my brother's birthday....

Tonight is ... mall, dinner, Sky Captain, popcorn and just generally spending some quality time with my number one darling.

Oh yeah, today is Pluto's birthday (so the tats in his ears tell us) which is what reminded me of Andrew....Pluto is now five and Andrew will be 13!!!! Holy cow.

Lounge weekend! Absolutley no obligations and it was it was awesome. Our "Little" from Big Brothers Big Sisters is MIA ... no phone, full answering machine -- we even stopped by to see if anyone was home. Perhaps there was a family emergency. In any case, it opened up our weekend to do nothing.

Well that isn't entirely true. I finally got off my butt and delivered some stuff to Hilary (one of which includes my old sewing machine which was given to me by a friend a few years before in response to me going on about how I was sure I would be an awesome seamstress/tailor/whatever, if only I had my own sewing machine.) Ha ha ha. I used it ... oh say three times? Once for making Pluto's dog coat, curtains, and ... uhh....oh I am sure there was something else. In any case, I heard the age old plea and this time, I realized, I was the one to pass on the means.

So...I can't wait to see what fantastic items she is going to sew.

Myself, I want to make a new tote bag...but I don't have any good material at home. I thought of using a towel...and lining it or something...but that would kind of suck. All I have is craploads of calico stuff...and some heavy black material I wanted to save and use for my traditional ho chunk outfit (if I ever get around to it...cos the material came from my grandmother). So I guess I could use that...except it's light cotton and not heavy at all. I even found some unused needles for heavier material I could use without having to buy more. I suppose I could buy something and cut it up...but it isn't the same as being super thrifty and finding stuff around the house.

Yeah so... really the rest of the weekend was eating out at Pizza Hut on Saturday. And then on Sunday we weren't hungry enough for a fancy brunch like we orginally planned so instead we went to Dairyland for breakfast. That's pretty much all we ate too...I did make a cookie dinner last night though. ;P

I finished Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell....it picked up and also I was motivated to finish it so I could move onto Iron Council (Mieville) that Dave lent us and Tim said was really really good. As for Strange and Norrell...it was good. I guess I don't want to talk about it until someone else has read it. One great thing about having a reading weekend is how much better it made me feel. It restored a part of my old self. Reading inspires me and reminds me that I could be writer too if I just finished something and eliminated those wretched feelings of self-doubt.

Has anyone else noticed the English fantasy Renaissance? Look at what different works are coming out of the UK...the likes of Gaiman, Mieville and Clark (to name a few). I am feeling like I need to have some kind of pilgrimage to the old land to pay my respect and breathe the air, drink the water and have some bangers n mash -- in other words have some of that mojo rub off on me.

Well, I guess George RR Martin isn't english (although he kind of looks like a hairy english dude) ...but he hasn't exactly been able to get his latest book out either. I am going to have to actually go back and read the first three in order to get ready for it. Usually I never reread books (why waste that time when there are so many other books out there to read), but in this case I will have to make an exception.

So there is a coffee pot here at work and there is some mysterious nice gentleman that in charge of it. I've been offered to be introduced but have declined. He collects 3 or 4 dollars a month from all the coffee drinkers and that supplies the coffee, sugar, cream and cups. Well, I haven't paid anything in the form of bills because I like the idea of paying by the cup 25 cents. To be a little more accurate, it's more like ....two cups for 25 cents...although somedays I just clunk in odd amounts of change. One day I put in 16 cents. Anyway, so I haven't seen this guy to date, and to date he doesn't know me. Yet every day when I get my first cup and put in some change .... by the time I am ready for my second cup I sneak in there and VOILA! Change is gone. Sometimes there will be a fresh new pot too...I like it when that happens.

The two ladies here tell me that I can just pay the few bucks...but to be honest I rather like this cat and mouse actually paying 25 cents once in a while? Man, I would check it all the time if I knew there might be money in there.

I also use an old McDonald's coffee cup despite the three mugs I have scattered around my desk. What can I say? I like the lid and the stryrofoam -- keeps it toasty a lot longer.

I can't tell you what mi Madre sent me in the mai...no I'll have to take a photo. But seeing as I am work right now, that photo won't come for awhile. j

I went to TKD last night and all we did was cover foot sweeps and skipping kicks + combinations. Not too much of a work out -- more of an instructional class. Good thing I some DDR in earlier in the day. I had a feeling that would happen.

Last night I tried to make asian lettuce rolls....apparently they have a different kind of lettuce though so it turned into more of a salad. But it was still good, I never would have thought of radishs, red pepper, carrots and a green onion combo...drizzled with a soy/ginger/lemon/garlic sauce. Good stuff.

Oh my, I watched The Magdalene Sisters. I was not expecting to see what I saw. I was expecting some heartwarming story about three scrappy girlfriends who band together to survive an awful circumstance. The only thing I had right was the awful circumstance. I just don't understand the catholics -- they were so SO corrupt (and this happened in the 1960's! and the last laundry didn't close until 1996). How can these people feel that they were justified in their cruelty? How can these Men and Women of God believe that they were good and worthy enough to enter heaven? How can you take the mercy of the New Testament and combine it with the harshness of the old testament -- to make up your own cons and scams ... and have so many people believe it? I know I have some catholic friends, but judging from history I can't say I understand why so many choose to belong to or identify with a group of such corrupt, hateful, greedy, cruel, murdering fiends. Oh sure, there are some bad seeds (witch hunts, asylums, sex and that little thing called the inquisition -- oh not to mention the perpetrators of cultural extinction worldwide) but... just LOOK at how bad they are! And then to see all these sexual assault cases come out and people act like they are shocked. Maybe what they are really shocked at, is that this isn't acceptable behavior anymore. Acceptable as in talked about. There answer is repress it, try to forget it happened and shuffle the godly man off to be someone else's problem. Again, that isn't very charitable.

I guess I just haven't seen a movie that made me so disgusted with mankind in quite a while. Everything humans touch eventually becomes twisted, diseased, rotten or destroyed. One of the reasons I like science fiction so much is that it acknowledges mankind's overwhelming fallacies and at the same time tries to focus on the endurance of the human spirit. The little bits of starlight in a black endless sky that try to justify our mean pitiful little existence. I have hope that we will move past these problems and become something better -- but then again, I also hope daily that the end of the world or an apocalypse will happen in the next five minutes so we can get onto that next phase right now.

Oh, and check out my friend's The Martins (also a link on your left). They just moved from Madison to New York or something...I met Richard back when he showed up on my doorstep wanting a place to sleep. I made him spaghetti that night without meat. Okay okay, it was at the Indian house so that kind of stuff wasn't THAT uncommon. My reputuation isn't THAT tarnished. :P Richard is Menomoniee.

I saw this on Hilary's page while I was clicking on her ad's http://www.blogbinders.com/ What they do, is make a book from your journal! Amazing. To think of all the hours I wasted for the first two years of my journal coping, pasting and printing out. I am VERY tempted to get this...cos then I would have a hard copy of my online journal to keep. I kept up with this more than I do with paper journals which tend to be full of things I would never tell anyone else anyway and isn't very consistent.

It just looks like SUCH a cool idea.

My stepdad called last night and asked me if I got the present. I said "what present?" He replied "OH nothing. I'll call you tomorrow."

Um. Another birthday present this year? I mean my Mom hasn't given my a birthday present since I was ... what? 16 years old? Why am I getting one this year? Why have I gotten so many nice thoughts, gestures and gifts this year? It's like the universe is trying to console this mild winter depression by plying me with kindness and unexpected surprises. I have such wonderful friends and family.

I wonder what it is. I expect it will be there when I get home.

Rain dog is at the Vet today for a teeth cleaning and nail trimming. I was hoping they would keep her over night because the idea of getting a dog (especially Rainy) just off drugs is not my idea of fun. But Tim can handle most of it. That reminds me that I moved Koopa into the living room on the highest shelf next to a big plant. Why the change? Because the other night when we were all tucked into bed a loud crash emitted from the house. "What was that?" asked Tim. I replied that I didn't know and it kind of sounded like it was from the guest room. Then he says "I hope it wasn't Koopa" and jumps out of bed and says

He goes into the office and within a few seconds I hear the dreaded "Fuck!"

Damnit. I get out of bed and go into the room to see that her cage has been smashed to the ground, the top has come off and Koopa is missing. I immediately shut the door and stuffed a towel under it to keep predators out and Koopa's in. Tim cleaned up the mess and then we started the careful process of looking for her. There is a hole type thing in the closest behind the tub...and leads underneath the tub. It has a little wood panel that doesn't stay shut well --but I have managed to cover with a box to prevent the cats from going there. Tim started bitching to me about how I was supposed to have it closed and that if he were a possum he would have gone there.

I kept my mouth shut about other suggestions I had for him as a possum and closed the thing as best I could. We looked under the shelves, under the desks (3) the the papasan, and then back to the closet when Ol' Eagle Eye spotted her creeping along the wall towards the file tower. I looked over Tim's shoulder and saw her tail and puffy little self cowering in the corner....we then proceeded to clean out everything one at a time. Eventually I was able to make a barrior with some cardboard so she couldn't go anywhere and Tim scooped her up (she didn't even bite him!). She was deposited back into the cage and was moved into the guest room where we all could get some sleep without hoodlum cats mucking things up.

Man...they knocked over and broke plants...knocked over and almost doomed Koopa...they've been infighting for the last week. Those bastards. They need to go to a detention center for delinquent cats.

Last night I watched Resident Evil: Apocolypse and it sucked. But you now they said that the Day After Tomorrow sucked too but I really liked that. Well, now who was this Veronica girl? Did they combine video games and bring Codename Veronica into this ga...er movie? Overall, it was a fun preteen movie but the whole time I could just imagine how it would play out for a video game. Each scene was a mission and I could tell where the cut scenes were...it was like they didn't even bother writing a screenplay for it but just adapted a video game into a movie. As a video game it would be good...as a movie it isn't so good.

As you can tell by the length of this post, I am the only one here for the majority of the day. Rather for the hours I work (8-1.20). So, while I have a few things...they are things that will get done in due time. Don't be hasty.

I wish I had a donut.

Oh another low day. MSN isn't working today and it's terribly lonely without my darling to talk to. Even if we don't talk to each other all the time, I like to see that he IS there if I want to talk to him. I started out good this morning...worked on the poncho, watched ER and a movie, then ironed the two aprons for sewing...then somewhere between Ellen and Roseanne...it went downhill. I fed let the dogs out, feed them, tired to log into msn again and .. blah. Oh and I paid like seven bills this morning and got them in the mail in time. I guess that's gotta count for something.

Heather is going to come over tonight for DDR. I am diligently working on doing that every day because they say exercise makes everything right. Right? I hope so.

I wish I could sew like Zoey. I haven't even started it yet, and I know it will probably be okay...but man she is good. She could make anything. I wonder how she got that good...how did you get that good Zoey? And Sarah...made her own dang wedding dress...how did YOU learn how to sew Sarah? Where do people get these talents? It must be inbred...that MUST be it.

Last night I made Pancitti. I played Ghost Recon and that was fun. I am started to get a bit better...it's so hard to see those little dudes so far away. Halo is much easier in that my target thing glows red when it's an enemy. On Ghost I keep thinking rocks are enemies because they are bright green in the nightvision.

Well, I am going to force myself to write a page for a letter, wash my face, put on a bra and later maybe vacuum the living room. Cleaning is supposed to be another ...cleanser. Puts away the bad and starts things fresh.

I forgot to mention yesterday that I was accepted at a judge for Odyssey of the Mind! I will be judging the Stunt Mobiles (Vehicles) which is very similar to the Delayed Reaction problem I had myself when we went to State back in the day. I am so excited. NOW if I can figure out how to be a forensics judge then I would in top shape.

That's pretty cool.

Well despite having a rotten morning, and being all crusty, I am feeling much better. I have the energy I have been lacking. I feel like such a whiner. I guess that is because I am. I brought an umbrella with me to work today. Hopefully I won't have to use it on the way home, or lose it for that matter. I have such a problem with keeping hold of these dang things.

Dangit! I have a cold. I am glad that is a common cold this time..but still. When is this going to stop?! When can I be healthy again and completely back to my old self? I feel like such a waste. Everything I try to do seems like it is taking monumental amounts of effort.

I suppose. The hardest part of living to keep pulling yourself up by your bootstraps.

I am all explody again -- but I don't want to take another benedryl yet because it makes me so sleepy and I already had to take a nap today. Hmm.

Tim's parents came for a visit today...and they brought gifts! Wow. We got two new handmade fluffy fleecy type blankets, a two liter soda cooler, a left handed calander for Tim, a Star Wars Monopoly game --- and for my birthday...guess what the Mother in Law gave me? If you guessed a brand new sewing machine, I would like to hire you out for other questions I have my life.

But yeah, it's a BRAND new sewing machine! It's a little blue number that didn't work right away when we tried it out so there was a whole shebang where we had to go to East Town Mall and exchange it for another at Sears (with a Cinnabon for me) followed by a trip to JoAnn Fabrics (him mom wanted to go) where she bought me a sewing machine suitcase type thing. My god. IT's too much, but I couldn't say no since she was SO intent on it. I mean, at least it was on clearance, but 40 bucks for at travelling suitcase for my brand spanking new sewing machine...oh boy. IT's so easy to use, it purrs like a champ, it's cute....I'll take a picture or two. I am still kind of overwhelmed. I set it up in the guest room on a a little desk I had in there since I got a new one.

And at JoAnn's, I got a cross-stitch project to work on ... it was on sale for 10 bucks! A eagle in the moonlight...it doesn't look TOO complicated and it goes along with all the other Eagle paraphenlia I am acquiring. Or maybe I will give it to my Dad -- like he doesn't have enough Eagle stuff in his place either...(being Eagle clan means lots of Eagle stuff. ;) ) It will take me probably six months to finish it anyway. Tim talked me out of getting the Kitten hanging from a branch "Hang in There" pattern because...yes it is cheesy and funny, but actually buying the kit and then cross-stitching it is a little too much. I guess I have to agree.

What a great, practical gift though. I am excited to make the aprons I cut out for myself and Hilary and would love to start ironing it tonight so I could sew it....but I just feel too darn crappy. And since I ate a Cinnabon I can't even work up an appettite to feed my darling. Maybe I will just make him shrimp poppers for dinner. I know, it's lame but we did have a good lunch - Franks N Beans.

We got new shoes too! I got two pairs...a pair of athletic shoes and nice pair of everyday shoes. I wore them when I tried to go the Indian Storytelling thing last night with Kathleen and Chuck. It was WAY packed and after standing the back and being bossed around by women with kids -- we just left before it even started. We went to the Weary Traveller and had a nice chat. I love that bar and it was nice to hang out those two. Such nice people. :)

Well, I just can't seem to get it together to write anything interesting. Or be interesting for that matter. I admire sick people who can still maintain a postive attitude very much right now.

Nothing much going on the online blog world today so I figured I better put something up. Yeah.

Here I am, at work. I was 20 minutes late. But it's okay cos I was really tired this morning and I am the only one here today. Really tired. Usually I can get up and get moving but this morning felt like my teenage mornings of old. At most I only ever hit my alarm snooze twice. I had to keep the clock across the room because of the times I turned it off without really waking up. I would stumble across the room towards the fuzzy red light, hit the buttom and collapse back in bed. When the second beep went off 7 or 9 minutes later I would lunge toward it, turn if off and then sit on my bed for a moment while I remembered who I was.

Ahh, 15 minutes to get ready and leave. Nothing much has changed between the Teenage Laura and Present Day Laura. 15 minutes was all I needed to pee, wash my face, brush my hair, get dressed and maybe quickly have a bowl of cereal before out the door. Present Day Laura needs a 1/2 an hour because in addition to previously mentioned chores, she has to make her husband's lunch, pack a snack for herself, let the dogs back in, mock sass/fight with Tim -- best part of the day really.... get my stuff together, put the dogs away, mail out and double lock the door. Still, if I needed too, I could still be ready in 15 and the average bystander wouldn't know the difference. I look rather slumpy lately anyway.

That reminds me. I had a dream this morning that I was in Boyceville (why do I always dream of this wretched school? I guess because I spent 5 years there? 5-10th grade -- those are formative years). I was walking to the school early in the morning and saw a young hispanic man walking ahead of me. He was a teenager -- just moved to Boyceville three months before and was super gothy cool. I mean he didn't look like a buffoon. He had cool hair, great boots, black jeans, a slightly tailered black long coat and confidence to match. I went up and talked to him.

"Hey," I said. He looked startled to see me talk to him.
"Why are you talking to me?" he asked.
"Because I wanted to." I responded.
"Did you? Or did you talk to me because of the way I look?" he questioned.
"I thought you looked cool, and in this town that is hard to find." I replied. "Besides, there was once a day when I was pretty cool...not like ..." I gestured to my sloppy self "this."
"So what are you doing here?" he asked as we entered the school.
"I moved here six months ago and right now am working on continuing eduction credits so I can keep my education certificate." I nodded toward him and walked into a classroom.

End dream.

So...what is the most preposterous thing about this dream? The cute hispanic teenager in Boyceville? My lack of coolness? That I finally wasn't student that had to go back to high school for some inane reason? No, my friends. The creepy part is the education thing. Ugh! Me? A conventional teacher? Oy. I can't even imagine.

And yet I can. But only in the heroic sense for rural kids who have no insight into the possiblities of the future. Hmm.

Moving on, this weekend I am going to the a Trickster Storytelling tomorrow night with Kathleen, Chuck and even TIM! Yeah...whoa. I figured since he was going to have to give me a ride there and pick me up later that maybe I should ask him if he even wants to go. ;) And there is even a Dine person telling stories -- do you know Mr. Jack Jackson personally Zoey? Or do you just keep your public relations to only the highest members of the indian goverment?

I opted out of the Friday night 'creation stories' because that tends to attract new agers. Although, as I said to Kathleen in an email, new agers are like monkeys in that you can't stop from looking at them. If only they were as incomprehensible as monkeys (although some could argue that they are). Oh but what I am I saying...I have TONS of new ager friends. I love them...they are so darling and precious.

Okay...what else? Oh Kites on Ice ... although if this warming trend continues then is there going to be any ice? We are going on Sunday with our little for an hour. I think he has a Super Bowl party that he is going to at his church and apparently that football shindig starts at 3:00. Tim was invited to a Super Bowl party last night by his gaming group! I get the distinct feeling that that invitation isn't extended to me. :( I am not really thrilled about Kites because we went last year and it was really just kind of boring. The only reason we are going this year is because it is definitely something we can do with our little that doesn't cost much -- just the price of a hot coco or something.

I started to work out again yesterday in an attemp to battle the glass half empty feeling I have been having lately. I was hard to get motivated to even do some DDR. Although when I did it -- I felt jiggly and jaunty -- but was still better than I remembered! And I have been going out with Tim to walk the dogs and a breakneck speed when available (last night it was really icy). I have been collecting bad news items for the past week -- I know it is the not the frame of mind one is supposed to have...

1. Unknown fat cat sits of makeshift shelf and breaks three potted plants all over the office floor.
2. Percap check is less.
3. Dentist bill payment thinger (it's under 20 but why should I pay? Dude I already did and so did the insurance).
4. Rainy got diarrhea again.
5. My TKD classes changed to 6:00 - 7:00 now making it nigh impossible to get there on time. I mean, it the winter its tough because it's too cold to ride bike and walking there would take 45 min....without sidewalks most of the way...in the dark and cold....blah. And Tim is never home when he should be.
6. Main computer generated a "hardware error" the other day prompting Tim to go into hysterics that the computer is on it's last legs.
7. Prediction of limping computer prompts me to put off my dream bed for several months while I first save the money for a new computer.
8. Ran out of stamps

But since I just allowed myself such a selfish list of pitying -- I should include some good things that happened this week...

1. Got a free magic eraser in the mail!
2. Got a package full of Czech wafers and a book in the mail from old friends.
3. Got three birthday cards.
4. Went grocery shopping and now have food
5. Hung out with Hildog and had a good time.

There. Ho Hum...I have one solid thing that I need to do today. One. The rest is just data entry that could take as long or a little as I like. I think to extend it a bit because it's the only back up thing they have for me right now, and I already did half of the job by telling the mail dude that I have a box for him to pick up at 1:00.

I wonder what the bad news item will be for today.

I was just talking with Tim about the new desk. When I say "new" I don't mean new. I mean we bought it from a friend and it has nicks, pieces hammered together and stains. It, like everything else we own, has flaws. The couch is clawed to hell cos ... well I got it for free. The futon used to be nice....but the futon cushion itself is screwed, the new dresser from Brandi has blue paint all over it, the old dresser from Sigrid and Matt is missing a handle and is kinda wobbly, Tim's parent's old dresser is just plain old and ugly, the bed's frame is all warbled and the bed itself was a gift from St. Vinnies when I broke my back. My desk is all nicked and beat to hell, the coffee table has ink all over it and ...well it was a hippie xmas sale find and the varnish is starting to fade again. The coffee table-that-Tim-isn't-to-sure-about and the chairs I got from Bear down the street is all eaten on the inside from some animal...shall I continue? No? I didn't think so. Anyway, we were talking about this and

hadjare says:
ha ha. Well, I guess it will be okay. I mean, it has some nicks and stuff...but what of our furniture doesn't? I mean, there is something wrong with everything we have.
Cimex says:
Yeah, we're not 'brand new' kind of people.
hadjare says:
but were aren't the cool antique kind either.
Cimex says:
No, we're second hand.
hadjare says:
Ohhhh...second hand.

We are second hand people. Dang.

Hey Happy February. I have a kitten in my kitchen that is hanging on a branch...I'll take a picture of it for you. I know you'd LOVE to see it. Doesn't it just kind of resonate with what we are all feeling right now?

Okay, please take a look at my English Friends journal -- James he often has witty things to say. You can also find him sitting at your left on the links part. While you are at it you can see Hilary's new page with pictures and stuff...and individuality (unlike the mass LJ) at click here- Hilary . Anyone else want to be added to the links to the left?

So today I am reorganizing the office. Heather is coming over tonight and we are going to DDR for exercise. yeah, we are totally going to be buff in no time. But in order to do that I have to move the big bulky desk out of the living room and put it together. At this point there are two pieces in here before I had to stop and update you on this breaking news. I'll take pictures to make it more interesting...yeah.....

I went and had some blood drawn this morning. I am pissed at myself for not complaining to the lab tech that she was doing a poor job. Yeah she found a vein right away...but once she got the needle in she didn't stay still and I could feel the long metal moving around inside my vein and it hurt! Man did it hurt. She was obviously distracted....I should have said something. But I didn't. I was taking it like a champ.

What does taking it like a champ accomplish? Another shitty job done? A similar performance that she is going to do on someone else? Normally having blood drawn doesnt' hurt...it shouldn't hurt aside from the needle stick...dang. Afterward I insisted Tim stop at McDonald's and buy me breakfast. And yes, I think I will make it a point to stop at McD after any doctor appointment. Just like after a dentist appointment I am always sure to get something sweet to eat. It's just the way it works.

OMG! I forgot to say that my friends Karen and Dave (old college buddies) are the best! I got their package yesterday with a book and a whole bunch of wafer candy from the Czech Republic! I ate two right away yesterday and one this morning for after breakfast dessert. It's SOOOOOooooOOOOo good. Now I have to think of something really good to send them (they are in the Czech for one more year -- she is doing graduate work and he is teaching english). What happy thing to return home from work...a package, filled with wafer candy. I hate that America only has Kit Kat, those crappy strawberry/vanilla/chocolate wafers at the store and now Butterfingers wafer .... but THREE? Come on people...what is the problem here?

Alright, alright. What else can I say. I saw The Cuckoo the other day...another crazy finnish movie....but it was really good. I love watching movies that show a portrayl of someone else's daily life. Can you imagine living out the middle of no where at the edge of nothing? I couldn't stop thinking about it for days.

Hey I got the new Resident Evil ...I can't wait to see it. I love apocalypse movies (but you knew that, did you?)